h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I feel that I am under ignored. This conversation is for people who feel likewise. The rules are simple, if no one posts a message I will have succeded. However if someone does and the post ignores me then I have also succeded. If anyone aknowledges anyone else they must join in ignoring me or else face being ignored. If anyone aknowledges me or someone who failed to ignore me they should be ignored. Did I mention how simple the rules are? No, no don't answer that question or you've missed the point. Point?

Did? someone say something?

What this discussion about?

What?

Well it's about whatever I want. No, wait that can't work. It's about whatever I don't want. No that breaks the rules too. OK it's about whatever you want as long as I don't have anything to do with it. Or rather are not included. But actually included in that I am here. But ignored. So you shouldn't pay any attention to this post. Well not openly anyway. Is that clear? No, again don't answer. Oh, and whoever else feels like they should be ignored, too. They should be.

I look upon this thread as a growing plant. A venusian fly-trap kind of plant. Sooner or later someone will wander on to it when it grows to another page (nice metaphor, huh? Oh never mind..) and not check the thread to see what the subject is. They will admit to my existance in some way and BANG! the trap will shut. I will tell them about it and then ignore them as I expect everyone else will (call it Shunning if you will, or maybe being Ignorated). Hahahahahahahaha! How evil of me. And so it grows....

Do you often get ignored?Is this a cry for recognition?Are you one of the easily forgotton or overlooked?If so join the Society for the Instantly Forgettable(we are discussing a name change at the moment).Come and be welcome at A811810 and maybe stand for the committee.

Incog.

I certainly hope that was a general invitation rather than a direct request. If it was person-to-person I would be forced to ignore you. I think. But as a *billboard* type announcement I'm sorry I must ignore you. I believe. What do you think? (heh, heh, heh...)

Ok.
Byeee.

However if you get fed up with ignoring people do drop by.


Incog.

I feel that I must ignore you in this conversation. I speak to an absence since you have left. In this instance I think I can ignore your presence yet realise the existence of another reality. I may (or may not) not ignore your other reality. But here- you don't exist! (consider yourself Ignorated...or something).

Although nobody's listening, I sympathise greatly with the point behind this Conversation, or at least would have done, had there been one. I am personally convinced that I don't exist, and that I am therefore probably not Posting this at all. My tenuous existence is based upon my knowledge of one fact, which itself is untrue, and which I have long striven to divulge.
Once I have related this non-fact, I will be liberated, and can disappear entirely for ever. I have decided to record this fact in this thread, where no-one will ever read it...
...Wait a minute. I virtually wrote it down somewhere, on a piece of non-paper that I didn't put in this not-pocket...

I have now recalled the Fateful Fact, but I am faced with a terrible dilemma...

I suspect that anyone knowing the Fact will be forced to bear it through eternity, trapped by it in a kind of non-existence, doomed to be ignored for ever. It's that kind of Fateful Fact, in fact.

If this is so, then how can I plant the Fact here? I thought at first that no-one was ever going to read anything in this Conversation. But, then again, perhaps literally zillions of Researchers are reading this thread avidly, and are simply unable to acknowledge each other, being bound by the strict rules of the Thread, that weren't set out by anyone at the outset.
I can't even debate my dilemma with anyone, since they're all obliged to ignore me, even more so than usual.

Oh, bugger.



I know ! The way to resolve this dilemma is to declare that I will divulge the Fact at a particular time, so that everyone who's ignoring me may be forewarned, and so make a point of not coming here to read it.

Be advised, therefore, you lot who aren't actually here reading this, that I will divulge the Fact at...hang on a mo...where did I put my non-watch?

** fixes attention on a fresh hot **

Its lonely here in H2G2. Why does nobody ever talk to anyone else.

Excuse me can you direct me to the orchestra pit ?

dear ignored,

please join United Friends A703126

you go for picnic
or play game caled next word
or be tickled in elmo's club

120 United Friends can not be wrong!

Once again I am on the horns of a dichotomy (or is that the trumpet of a disassociation?).
Am I being referred to directly or is this a general posting. A poster as it were. Am I here? Were they there? Am I being sufficiently ignored?
Could I be ignored better elsewhere?

buy house on island without other humans, then you can be ignored by animals and headhunter.

I am sorry, you failed to ignore me. I regretfully inform you that you should and will now be ignored in return.

How're everyone else then?!

thanx

These people (if they existed), what would we call them. *The Shunned* or *Ignorations*? Again I must stress in fairness you are ignoring me so the questions are Rhetorical (the long form of Mr. Butler's name).