h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

BUSH ESCALATES WAR ON ENVIRONMENT

Seattle, April 24, 2001 (BSNS)

A coalition of environmental activists and eco-scientists stepped up their criticisms of White House environmental policies at a news conference in Seattle today. At issue was Bush's move, reported Monday, to rescind newly implemented guidelines on the amount of allowable dihydrogen monoxide (hydroxyl acid) in the nation's water supply.

The new EPA regulations, calling for a 50 percent reduction in the allowable amount of dihydrogen monoxide in drinking water, was implemented by the Clinton Administration on January 19, 2001, just days before the inauguration of George W. Bush.

"The deadly potential of dihydrogen monoxide cannot be over-emphasized," said Bruno Ahrens, spokesman for the coalition. "This invisible killer kills thousands of people worldwide every single year. By allowing large amounts of dihydrogen monoxide to remain in our water supply President Bush has signed a death warrant for thousands of Americans, many of whom will be children. It is yet another example of Bush's willingness to declare open war on our precious environment for the benefit of his big-money corporate supporters and contributors."

Documentation distributed by these friends of the environment described dihydrogen monoxide (DHMO) as "colorless, odorless and tasteless," and said that it kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of the deaths from DHMO come from accidental inhalation. A prolonged exposure to DHMO in its solid form can cause extreme tissue damage.

Other dangers of DHMO are listed as:

DHMO is a major component of acid rain
DHMO contributes to the world's "greenhouse effect."
DHMO can cause severe burns resulting in death.
DHMO is cited as a major cause of erosion of our natural landscape

DHMO can even cause corrosion and rusting of many metals!

In addition, DHMO is used as an industrial solvent and is a major component of the production of nuclear power. It is used in the production of styrofoam, as a fire retardant, and in many forms of animal research. It is widely used in the distribution of pesticides and is an additive in many junk foods.

A press release issued at the conference reads: "After many years of dedicated work by friends of the world's environment, the enlightened Clinton Administration finally issued regulations that would reduce the amounts of this deadly substance that would be allowed in the nation's water supply. Furthermore, the new regulations would have prohibited corporations from dumping waste DHMO into our rivers, lakes and the oceans. Now that Bush has revoked these much-needed regulations our lakes, rivers and streams, our oceans and our very drinking water will remain polluted by this deadly substance.

"By his actions George W. Bush has vividly demonstrated his absolute disdain for our environment and the right of the American people to clean air to breathe and clean water to drink. This is the Republican agenda, corporate profits over the health and welfare of the people."

I really wish h2g2 would spell check when you hit preview! Instead, I notice the error 30 seconds after I click Post Message.

I apologize for the error.

Hah! That's the first time I've ever heard of the Clinton administration labelled 'enlightened.' Is that what they call criminal behavior these days?

Clinton set a trap for the Bush administration when those things signed in the midnight hour of his tenure. It's more of the same old partisan bulls**t we have to deal with. And Bush fell right into it, because he has to pay off the corporations who funded the legal farce that got him in office.

I say let's let the two of them just duke it out like men, and clean out the White House of the effects of both of these neanderthals.

Mr Moron, dihydrogen monoxide is water. What are you asking the h2g2 Community?

Should have known better than to try to pull this off here, but I was curious. I was just trying to see what kind of reaction it would get.

Young rascal!

It's a hoax that was put together by a local talk show host. He wanted to see how far it could get.

I haven't had anyone bite. I guess my friends are too smart.

The host claims that a few years ago, he was on a rant about the dihydrogen monoxide. The director of the Atlanta Water Authority got on the phone and told him that there was no reason for alarm, because there wasn't any dihydrogen monoxide in the water supply.

With the quality of folks that run Atlanta, I wouldn't doubt it.

Tut. Talk show hosts ah? They have no respect! They should be ashamed of themselves - preying on the gullible and the weak minded like that Disgraceful!

A few years back I was on a mailing list. There it was told it was an australian guy who went around at doors talking about it, to see how gullible people were. As you could expect he got a lot of signatures about banning the stuff. A bit sad for the enviromentalists.