h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yesterday I had my influenza inoculation injection. It was a jab well done.

Television is considered a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.

I tried to tidy the office but it was a task. It felt like all the stationery kept on staying stationary

avoid bad organisations - practice safe sects

I joined a jazz band and practiced safe sax

On post 23864, there was a passage relating to safe sects and sects change operations in the early '60s black and white version of Rock Hudson's film noir effort "Seconds".

Those who are in sects have six legs.

If you forgot the direction the sun rises, don't worry, it'll dawn on you

The sun's et the darkness once again .

are rude, because they use fowl language

My birth weight was 5.7 kilos. No stork could carry me. They had to use a crane

It was the week before Christmas. Wan Ho's charity golf tournament had just gotten under way when somebody murdered one of the players. The media began calling it Wan Ho's Open slaying.

a one horse open sleigh ? so who pulled it after killing the horse ?

(slay)

Down at the car cemetery they were slaying a dead hearse

Even though our department has never managed to solve a single murder, we still regard such a crime as a grave matter.

Quite a few people left the office to attend Ash Wednesday services at lunch - it was a mass exodus!

The water department staff said they would be fluid in answering all mystifying questions asked at a recent meeting.

"May I have some water?"

"What, dear?"

"Water"

"The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plane! So how come the runways dry ?

The plane flies like an arrow. This is because of arrownautics.