h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Entering the cave he walks to the back and finds a crack in the rock no wider than an inch. He then walks back to the center of the cave, where a strange rock, with a bowl like hollow in the top, rises from the cave floor, within the bowl of which is water. Bob puts his finger and stirs it slowly, and an image appears, it is Shairi on the beach. He watches her*

*Seeing what's going on down on the beach Bob runs from the cave, hoping he can warn her before it's too late*

*The cat enters and walks towards the back of the cave and waits there for the others to arive*

*Follows the cat.*

What's your name? I mean- what can I call you?

[Cat] Waits we will for Raphiel, Introductions we can do then.

*A few moments later Bob enters the cave*

Well, so, would you like to tell me what's been going on?

[Cat] Your woman wants introductions

*Bob blushes, looks at shairi and looks back at the cat*

She, she's not my woman...

[Cat] Oh well, pleanty of time for you to c'rect that

*Bob starts to get flustered*

No, look she's allready got someone... Anyway, introductions. Shairi, this is Kraal. Kraal, this is Shairi. Kraal is a king, and a very old friend...

*Bows to Kraal, somewhat embarrassed.*

Honored.

Yes, if you could tell us what's going on...?

[Kraal] I doo not know everything, Only what I seen and heard... Would it not be easier if I changed?

Yes, probably. Shairi, do you mind.. umm, looking away?

*Turns away from Kraal*

[Kraal] Thank you L'dy Shairi

*The air in the cave seems to buzz with energy and some of the most unpleasant squelchy, cracking and creaking noises you can imagine are heard. When Kraal speaks next his voice sounds different, much more noble and articulate*

[Kraal] Err, Raphiel, you couldn't lend me something to... you know?

Ah.. yes, yes of course

*there is a rustling of cloth*

You can turn around now Shairi

*when she turns round, Where Kraal was is now a man. Although still slightly feline in apperance Kraal is now a muscular and, if you like that kind of thing, handsom man. He is wearing Bob's cloak and Bob's sword can now be seen hanging from his waist, it is a finely crafted, expesive, regal lookin weapon*

*Is somewhat taken aback at Kraal's sudden transformation, but quickly passes it off as being something like a werewolf. Still, she opens and closes her mouth quickly several times before words can come out.*

What has happened?

*Kraal looks at her with this 'are you really that stupid?' look and answers her slowly and carefully*

[Krall] Well, while you were looking away I changed form my quadrapedal, that means 'having four legs', form to my bipedal, that means 'having two legs', form. Then because I was naked and I didn't know if you would have a problem with that Raphiel lent me his cloak

*Looks at both Raphiel and Kraal.*

You two are cut from the same cloth, you know that?

I meant what happened to your people?

*Kraal and Bob look at each other and laugh*

[Krall] My people, well most of them, haved underground,

*Krall gestures to the back of the cave*

[Krall] To seek safety with those of Raphiel's people who remain loyal to their heretige. I thought I had already explained all this?

You explained that much, but that's not all of it by a long shot.

Who is this, that is taking Raphiel's people away from him? And why have they chosen to hunt you, if your people have always gotten along reasonably well?

[Kraal] The current Elder of the people, when he came to power was fine for a while. He followed the lore as well as any other might. After a while things changed. He started to claim divinity himself. He said he was the new God of the Shadow Elves and he changed the Lore. This all happened not long after humans came. I'm not sure where they live, There are many vilages on the surface now, some were built by the Shadow Elves when they changed, some were built by the humans, but most were my peoples, though they have now been taken over by humans and 'Dark Elves' as they like have taken to calling them selves. I do not know if these humans and the Dark Elves are working together then I do not know it, but the time of their arival and that of the change in so many of the Elves cannot, I fear, be purely a coincidence

My condolences, but what can I do?

[Kraal] I do not know. Surely you know your abilities better than I do

I am an assassin... are you talking a contract?

*Kraal spits*

[Kraal] I will not discuss that here and now... Maybe, in the future it will come to that, but for now I will not

Very well then... that is my strongest ability- inhuming targets. I do not believe I can help you further if you do not wish me to use it.

If you expect me to fight out of the goodness of my heart, forget it. I tried that once, and look what it got me.