h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The woman's an annoying, patronising head, for crying out loud!
Don't get me started again on school IT rooms. I was banned for compromising security.

I was banned for running in the IT room, then the sentence extended for post-dating my signature on the from promising to use the internet responsibly (which included not going on hootoo)

It must be over half of the people don't like her, that's why they took her off the ad.

I haven't been banned yet; us sixth formers get our own IT room (it's the careers room really, where we think really hard about UCAS. honest.) so there's practically no chance of being caught.

Hah, Clare, you're lame. After inserting virii and trojans onto the school network, I repeatedly spread subversive literature, helped share coursework around the school, repeatedly abusing privileges, repeatedly insulting and abusing IT staff, being belligerent to members of staff, being rude to the Headteacher, for helping code and distribute a program that allows illegal communication inter-and outer-school net, and finally for so so nearly managing to give administrator privileges to all pupils and wiping the back up disk and main hard drive through use of an extremely powerful electromagnet made in science. Banned for the rest of my tenure; nearly put on my permanent record and banned from every computer in the county of Surrey.

Ah, subversive literature. We practically have a factory of it. A spoofed version of the prefect application notice. A whole website devoted to taking the pi$$ out of various members of the school. All that. Acutally the site is very good. Remember those books you had when you were young, when it said "disarm the bomb- turn to page 73; run away- turn to page 20"? It's like that, but we've made our own script. You can add options and everything.

How did you stay allowed into the IT room long enough to do all that? I have a friend who was banned for a week for eating an apple. If I'm lame, it's only because they've lamed me sniff.

I think some of it was set up from home, that's how devoted to corruption we are. Eating is come down upon particularly hard, but that's because it makes it all the more difficult to write subversive code if the < key has been gummed up by rotting apple and spilt coke.

Clare- I stayed in that long because I'm clever and they're stupid and I was devoted to teaching them a little lesson in respect and capitalism.
Devoted to corruption? Do you know how many hours it takes to perfect an unnoticeable untraceable and subtle but ergonomic and perfectly timed, uncrashable technical chat program for Windows 2000/XP which cunningly avoids firewalls and proxys like a cunning fox? And then do you know how much time it takes to hunt down and ruin the life of one little gypsy who ragged on us to the head?*


*Comparatively little, actually.

Corruption requires devotion, or it's just e- vandalism. And that's a bit pathetic really, though I suppose it's a useful springboard on the way up to it.