h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I work as a physicist. Our Office Speak is mostly alphabet soup, as we like to abbreviate things. And we tend to use the Science Speak in real life as well.

My mother, who is an art historian, ended up working at a advertisement agency. When she tells me about her work, I get the impression that her colleagues really really like Office Speak. That annoys my mother to no end.

Another thing: I hate meetings. They are a waste of time. Only positive thing about them: You get paid for doing nothing.

Will you be attending the pre-meeting plannign meeting, to help plan out the agenda for the pre-meeting meeting, before the meeting next week? Meetings are such an utter waste of time on the whole....
We have a nice alphabetical soup going where I work too, all techy computer talk, which is utterly over my head; I really do have to have a dictonary of abriviations to hand when they're getting going on the work forums with DRV bindings, and all other manner of utterly meaningless (to me) talk ; When this gets overly used in meetings I have to attend I find just nodding a lot makes it look like your taking part and undersanding what is going on

I'm not really complaining about this, but has anyone noticed how your speech changes when you become a parent? Parent speak is stripped of swear words (hopefully) and even negative ones. 'Naughty' become 'not nice', 'angry' becomes 'disappointed' and you have to resort to a host of cute words for bodily functions and parts.

Also, gramatically, you start talking about yourself in the third person: "Mummy is feeling very sad about your behaviour today."