A Conversation for Camelost

24. (24 November)

Post 1

Dmitri Gheorgheni - Post Editor


'You sure this is safe?' Bertie made a point of refusing Gawain's hand, as she stepped carefully into the very leaky boat.

'You're about to row out, in the bloody dark, into a freezing, junk-filled lake, in a forty year old pedalo, shaped like a bloody dragon, in search of an ancient, magical sword.. and you ask if it's 'safe'? By the Old Gods, you've turned into a bloody whinging wimp Bertilak!'

Emrys puffed at his joint and grinned evilly through the smoke, as he cast off.

'Of course it's not bloody safe!
'Fear not, Good Lady Knight!' Gawain proclaimed, as he jumped, rather carelessly into the fibreglass dragon, 'As Maiden's Knight, I would gladly lay down my life to keep the Fairer Sex from harm, gladly throw mys… '

'Fairer sex!' Bertie was positively crimson with rage, 'Look weirdo, I may be the reincarnation of one of your old drinking buddies, may be some strangely garbed…. '

She grabbed him by his leather Brandoesque lapels,

'But don't you ever, ever forget, I'm a strong, independent woman, and I will not hesitate to punch your stupid teeth down your stupidly scrawny neck if you ever, ever, talk to me like that again, you weird, cow-murdering, fascist, masogenistic, chauvinist pig!'

Gawain sat down. Although he didn't understand half the lady's words, he was sure they weren't complimentary. He decided discretion was the better part of valour and would try to be less chivalrous to this ill-tempered shrew!

Merlin spluttered with laughter, 'Welcome to the 21st century, good Sir Gawain, looks like ‘tis not only Arthur who needs to be a bit more woke!'

Arthur ignored the exchange, perched uncomfortably on the bright orange plastic slide of the pedalo, his mood had turned sullen the more lucid his thoughts became.

Talk of water and swords brought sudden painful flashes of memory, thoughts of his own failure, defeat and mortality.

Half-remembered snatches of time, ordering Excalibur to be returned to the Lady of the Lake, being ferried across yet more water to a mystical place, saved from death, only to be plunged into dreamless sleep in the dark embrace of the earth. Was there a difference, was death so unattractive?

Arthur continued his gloomy reflection, even if they recovered Excalibur: from what he'd learned of these strange new times, how was he supposed to bring peace, harmony, and spirituality to this alien, uncaring world?

The soft splashing of the paddlewheel whilst Merlin pedalled out into the basin of what had once been a family log flume thrill ride, the splashiest in all the lands, aptly named, given Arthur's current mood, Pendragon's Plunge.

24. (24 November)

Post 2

Caiman raptor elk - Escaping the Array

Just wondering how calling someone "Fairer sex" balances out against calling someone "weird, cow-murdering, fascist, masogenistic, chauvinist pig!" in Karma points. (better be fair than unfair or Hoover hold me "weaker")

I now have images of a sinking pedalo in my head...

24. (24 November)

Post 3

paulh, the apocalypse is coming, it's just late

Pigs who murder cows deserve all the opprobrium they get. (Can they even spell "opprobrium"?)

I wish "woke" hadn't become such a buzz word. It's the past tense of "wake," which makes me think of the reception after a funeral. We have seen so much death later, I'd rather not be reminded of it.

Maybe we will never be lucky enough to live in an era when irritating slang and slogans are few and far between. (fafb is itself idiom. oh, well.)

I'm thinking of Thanksgivings past when we celebrated with loved ones who are no longer among the living. So much future has been lost.

Forgive me, I'm doing my annual cold-season brooding.

24. (24 November)

Post 4

Caiman raptor elk - Escaping the Array

You are forgiven (if it is up to me). You are not the only one pondering mortality and such in the dark wintery days.

If being woke means the end of satire, I think we will miss out on a lot of stuff to develop independent thought. (it is better to have a good discussion than to hide bad thoughts. That is why the idea of banning "bad" words in Esperanto didn't really take off, I think)

24. (24 November)

Post 5

paulh, the apocalypse is coming, it's just late

I like satire, so I hope it's not ended.

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