h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

6.

Wayne G cued up the next track and faded it in. Dance music blared around the club, the dance floor packed, even for a Friday night.

Wayne loved his job, loved Lady's Night at the Avalon club, loved getting the crowds bouncing, but most of all, Wayne G loved getting high. And he got paid for it too!

Tonight Wayne was buzzing, colours strobed with the beat, the floor writhed with liquid humanity, he could actually taste the music! Totally, mind-blowingly, flying was Wayne.

The girls loved him. Free drinks, free pills, offers of after-hours delights flooded him, the bouncers had to drag several revellers off the stage, totally in to him they were, but Wayne G was flying, above it all, not interested in booze, or sex, he took the tabs, obvs, but his music was his lover, and she was insatiable tonight.

Wayne G's heart thudded to the beat, flesh hot, as drugs coursed through his veins.

Light streamed from his decks, the grooves of the vinyl dizzying in his vision, records spinning as fast as his head, drawing his gaze into the decks.

Wayne was unaware of the silence, oblivious to the boos and complaints of the crowd as the music stopped.

All Wayne G could think about, as his overworked heart faltered, was how beautiful his record deck was, how fascinating, how inviting, how familiar, how magical was the round table filling his fractured mind.

He struggled, as his body failed, to appreciate the beauty, recognise the significance, and fulfil his destiny.

Wayne G was sobbing uncontrollably, mourning some unknown loss, as the paramedics arrived.

Very good modern day tale of the unfortunate sir Gawain...

Sir Gawain it is... right... I didn't get it

I had a suspicion after Lance Hallot.

Lance Hallot, Wayne G, Gwen, the Avalon club.