Long ago, when I was still a small raptor elk, we visited some rural French village, probably to go to the market or to invade a ruined castle. When returning to the car, the old Raptor decided to be funny and get in the driver seat backwards. (I still have no idea why). For balance he grabbed the B-pillar of the car (the one between the doors). Innocent as I was, I got into the back seat and slammed the door (We had a Lada, it was slam or nothing). To our surprise, my father started doing a rather stupid dance routine while screaming "Open up!, Open UP!". Obligingly, I slowly rolled down my window to see what all the fuss was about. Only then did I notice his fingers trapped between my door and the B-pillar... My father (eventually) found the grace not to blame me for his own stupidity, although the window scene made that a bit harder.

Please note that no fingers were broken in the execution of this story, and the purple line across his fingers did go away after a month or two.

Now that I think of it, being close to me can be quite dangerous…

During one fundraising event with the Scouts, we were shooting at a target with an air gun. When I got the gun handed to me, I assumed that it was unloaded, so I held it loosely, barrel down, finger on the trigger. That was when I shot one of the other scouts standing next to me in the leg. Luckily, the result was only some profanity and a rather large bruise. He didn’t blame me all that much. (I think. It was definitely better than a lead pellet between the eyes, or an iron bar in the teeth.) (That also happened, but wasn't me!)

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Caiman Raptor Elk

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