I Couldn't Care Less: All the Difference

1 Conversation

A hypodermic needle and a vial

All the Difference

Have you ever wondered why you bother? Have you ever thought to yourself that you put in all this effort, hours of work, to no avail whatsoever? Perhaps you haven't, hopefully the fruits of your caring efforts are evident to you. But maybe you've found yourself considering the person(s) you care for and thinking- they're no better at all. They're not healthier or happier, they haven't made any progress and they never do. This week, therefore, we're going to try a bit of a comparative test.

Let's start off with a quick look at our two subjects. One of them has a carer in their life and we shall call them Sam. Our other subject will be called Jo. Jo does not have a person caring for them. Both of these people have similarities. Both suffered abuse as children. Both have physical and mental health problems. Both of them are out of work as a result of these problems, and neither has worked for some time now. Both are going through appeal processes with the Department for Work and Pensions with regard to the benefits they are entitled to. Now let's see how they are getting.

Jo struggles. He had an assessment for Disability Living Allowance recently, which he didn't go to because he was ill. As a result his appeal was rejected. Obviously there is a case to be made for saying that he should have told the assessment panel that he was unable to attend due to illness and to request an adjournment. Hold that thought. Now remember a time, if you can, when you were ill and had to phone in sick –properly sick- from work. Only there was nobody there to do it for you. You were trapped in the toilet. You were just constantly asleep. You could barely summon the energy to send a text. Now imagine that and then add the fact that you're always pretty rough to begin with, that you've been battling for this appeal for months and you've already been turned down twice even though you've been told you meet all the criteria. On the day, when it finally arrives, you feel like death. You can't summon up the energy to do anything and you consider fishing out the paperwork to make the phone call to be put on hold to try and explain yourself and you think ‘Oh what's the point? They'll only turn me down again anyway'.

So Jo didn't go, and the appeal was turned down. Sam's appeal is still to come, but when it does come, it won't be as hard. Sam hasn't had to do all the work for the appeal. Sam's carer helped with filling in forms, liaising with a local charitable group who will accompany Sam to the appeal, and kept up a stream of encouragement and support when Sam felt fed up. If Sam is feeling too ill to go on the day, Sam's carer will make the call to the DWP. Sam doesn't have to do any of this alone and that makes it physically and mentally easier than it was for Jo. Sam might not get the decision, but the support from Sam's carer has made, and will continue to make, a massive difference to the progress of Sam's appeal, as well as in any other areas of life as a disabled person where Sam needed support.

That's just one example of where a carer can make all the difference and not even know it. If Sam's appeal fails then Sam's carer will never really appreciate a difference their efforts made. Even if the appeal is a success, then they may not fully understand, without the benefit of a comparison, what an impact the role of carer can make in keeping someone's head above water, giving them the support and the strength and the encouragement to keep going when it's easier to fall over backwards. Sometimes continuing is more of an achievement than any of us can fully appreciate.

Articles by benjaminpmoore Archive


24.02.14 Front Page

Back Issue Page

Bookmark on your Personal Space

Conversations About This Entry



Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry


h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more