h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This topic makes me laugh because I've been saying "Off with their heads!" a lot the past week or so. And me a semi-buddhist! Guess I'm not fully enlightened, eh?

But, since I *am* Mother of God, Empress of the Universe, I guess I'll HAVE to step up and take some responsibility for making it all flow bouncily along. Soooo.... ummmmm... hmmmmm....

I guess I'd have to whack the people who refuse to accept responsibility for their own actions, who think the world 'owes' them something, who believe that their happiness can only come at someone else's expense, who just don't care about leaving anything worth a damn for anyone else as long as their own comfort is taken care of.

*POOF* There went most of civilization... ....

*DEATH wanders over and taps MoGgie on the shoulder*
"Could you repeat that bit about 'people who believe their happiness can only come at someone else's expense?"

And I guess there went me too! Funny how things like head-whacking can turn around and bite you in the butt. I guess it's not the most productive way of resolving issues after all. *sigh*

Back to the drawing board... (at least, that's what reincarnation theorists would say).

I'd have to agree with your desires to eradicate such futile people ... who just use up precious oxygen (gradually becoming a commodity, what with the refusal of the United States to ratify the Kyoto Protocol).

I'd like to nominate the following people for elimination as well:

i) people who walk slowly in shopping malls, creating a traffic problem

ii) people who don't refill empty rolls of toilet paper, as these are the same people who leave empty cartons of juice in the refridgerator

iii) people who think the world will grant them a living, despite the fact that the world was here first

iv) people who think they're better than everyone else, and then feel the need to express their "better" opinion on your bad day

AND, MOST IMPORTANTLY:

v) George W. Bush

hoooooooooooo

I almost typed 'there went the USA' instead of civilization, but US citizens aren't the only offenders, just pretty consistent in it.

Personally I don't mind people who walk slowly, but the ones who drive me nuts are the ones who walk slowly in groups clogging up the flow so you can't get around them. Subsets of that would be people with baby carriages (especially the double-wide ones) who park the damn things in whatever nook they find (usually blocking access to cash registers for the people who work there) and then wander off leaving screaming infants to shower the rest of us with their song.

Bush. Yeah. In HIS case, I hope those predictions of presidential years of doom come to pass. That's an awful thing to say and mean it, but I do. It's an odd position to be in because I actually believe conflicts are resolved only through dialogue and I hate the idea of use of violence to resolve issues, but I guess I think that he's creating his own karma and will draw his own kinda energy toward him.

What about OAPs who insist on doing their week's shopping in M&S and taking ages over it when the rest of the world only wants to buy a sandwich in their lunch break.

Or parents who insist in using their kids' prams as battering rams, or worse still, doing the same with those plastic "kiddy cars" that can be hired in shopping malls & supermarkets.

Shop assistants that talk to their pals when you are waiting to be served.

Radio Breakfast DJ's who talk incessant drivel when all you want is some decent music on the drive into work.

People who walk too slowly on busy pavements and won't let you pass.

I can totally agree with your nomination for George Bush.
If it was up to me, he'd have a nasty 'accident' involving a steamroler and a tube of toothpaste.