Politics

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Politics is a system whereby you can do things to help out your friends, while pretending in fact that you are doing these things for the benefit of a lot of people. People that you don't know, nor care to spend any time with at all.
You should never talk about politics in pubs. This is because people in pubs get quite uptight about what these groups of friends (or "Politicians", to use the correct terminology) believe and may actually want to maim you on their behalf.

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