St. Peters

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Here begins a slightly deranged entry for St. Peter's school in York, England.

I would describe all sorts of boring thigs like the curriculum, or what age pupils can go, or the prep school, but this ISN'T an advert for the school. I just thought i better warn anyone who happened to be in York and decided to walk past our school (not least anyone thinking about joining the school).

Another point to mention is that im gonna miss out the 6th form part of ths school...in fact I'm only going to talk about my age group - Year 11.

Firstly then the subjects and their teachers. However, because there are so many subjects and so many teachers (writing about them all would take years, ill just settle on English and Maths.)

English.

There are five sets for english, with Set1 being the people best at english, and set5 being the worst. If any of you were interested, im in set2. So Mr. Bullcock (unfortunate? oh yes.) takes set1, Mr. Owen-Barnett takes set2, Mrs. Hopkinson takes Set3, Mr. Lowe takes Set4, and ive forgotten who takes set5 (!! sorry!)

Mr. Bullcock is widely regarded as looking and acting like either an eagle or an owl (opinion is somewhat divided). The most scary thought is his rumoured ability to be able to swivel his head entirely round). I've never had him for english so i don't know whether he's a good teacher or not, but set1 generally get pretty good grades.

Mr. Owen-Barnett is widely regarded as being the sort of person who would be very very good as an army general. He usually takes 4 or 5 seconds pause before he says *anything*, and this can stretch to 30/40 seconds if its a long sentance. As you would expect, everything he says is exactly what he means, so he doesnt have much of a sense of humour in class. His most well-known phrase is "Ok. *5 second pause* I want you to *5 second pause* write for me *5 second pause* an imaginative essay *5 second pause* with the title *2 minute pause* aaaaaaaaaaaaaaambush." We belive he changed his mind half-way through telling us the title. This phrase/sentance/whatever is very well quoted by the better impressionists of the year. He is however, an excellant teacher. If you're good at the subject then you'll do well. If you're not, then you better "damn well pull your socks up or you'll be down to set5 before you can say 'anne robinson really is cruel'."

I wont bother talking about Mrs. Hopkinson or Mr. Lowe because.. well they're abit odd. Mrs Hopkinson knows fluent anglo-saxon and mr. Lowe has a strange obsession for the peanuts cartoons.

Maths.

There are, again, 5 sets for maths. Im sure you were spectacularly bored reading the last bit on english - so ill just write a short paragraph on my teacher, Mr. Ellis-Davis, (or Mr. E-D for the more daring). He's either a brilliant teacher or a really bad one. Again, opinion is divided. If he's a brilliant teacher then his dedication, enthusiasm and inspiration are awesome. If he's really bad then you could describe as obsessed, stupid, and silly. It's up to you really. I think he was probably a fantastic student "in his day" (sic) but being a maths teacher does rather limit your streed-cred. Ah well, such is life. I better stop now because the short paragraph is becoming longer.

Now a little bit about sport at Peter's. Oh, and I'm not being sexist but if i was to talk about both girl's and boy's sport you'd get bored quicker then if i just talked about boys. Please dont sue me.

The staple diet of sport at Peter's is rugby (or as its more affectionately known by the upper-class ponces and the weird headmaster with a stammer who's leaving soon anyway, 'rugger')
At the start of my year you're asked whether you want to do rugby or not. It's up to you. If you do decide you want to do rugby, then you do it constantly with nothing else. Rugby on Mondays after school, Wednesday during Games, Friday after school, and even on Saturday. Stupidly, the ironically fat games teacher has decreed that if you dont decide to do full-time rugby, you can do NO rugby.
So you get a choice of all sorts of other stuff like football, climbing, swimming, etc..

I can't be bothered to explain much more about the sport. Rugby is *everything*, and if you dont do rugby then you're nothing. This brings me subtely onto the next subject - girls.

If you're in the rugby team, you're fine - no need to worry. If not, then you're in trouble. The peer groups are roughly split up into two - cool and not cool. It works for the girls as well. It's abit weird really cause you might expect the not cool people to be really weird maths/science freaks with acne, but they're not. Most are genuinely nice guys and gals. The cool people are mostly so cool and so arrogant you cant tell where they're head finishes and their ass begins. Trust me, they're ideots, but the girls love it! *slaps hand on forehead.*

Makes no sense to me. Not much of the school does, come to think of it. Still - at least you know abit about it now, which helps... err.. somehow!

If you've ever Catcher in the rye, then its very like the school salinger left initally, err.. poncey prep i think it was called. If anyone knows please tell me.

Cheers, and hope you enjoyed reading (or skipping through!) the entry :)

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