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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 1

Bluebottle

Entry: 'Clerks II' - the Film - A87965879
Author: Bluebottle - U43530

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 2

Gnomon - time to move on

Clerks II

I see this film also has a Lord of the Rings reference.

Smith instead opted to make a low-budget comedy, surrounded by family and friends, initially hoping to make a film for a similar budget to Chasing Amy although his producer Scott Mosier persuaded him that for full justice to be given to the film's aims, a budget of $5 million would be more realistic, though still a smaller budger than the $20 million budget Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was made for.

This is too long and it has a lot of repetition: 4 budgets and 1 budger. smiley - smiley

Here's a rewording:

Smith instead opted to make a low-budget comedy, surrounded by family and friends. He had initially hoped to make something on the scale of Chasing Amy. His producer Scott Mosier, however, persuaded him that for full justice to be given to the film's aims, a budget of $5 million would be more realistic - bigger than that of Chasing Amy but smaller than Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.

It should be emphasised that though Weinstein financed the film but was not otherwise involved in its production
-->
It should be emphasised that though Weinstein financed the film, he was not otherwise involved in its production

that built on the characters already introduced but showing them coming -- remove the word "but"

The most difficult part of production was finding an empty fast food restaurant in America where they could film the fictional Mooby's and eventually found a disused Burger King
-- the grammar of this is wrong. The "eventually found a disused Burger King" belongs with "the most difficult part", suggesting that the most difficult part eventually found a disused Burger King. Reword it as:

The most difficult part of production was finding an empty fast food restaurant in America where they could film the fictional Mooby's. They eventually found a disused Burger King

The Silence of the Lambs reference and A highlight has to be -- you've joined two independent sentences here. Split them:
The Silence of the Lambs reference. A highlight has to be

particularly with regards what drove her to want to marry him -->
particularly with regard to what drove her to want to marry him
or better still:
particularly regarding what drove her to want to marry him (this reduces the repetition of "to")

relationship with his then-girlfriend Jennifer Lopez -->
relationship with his then girlfriend Jennifer Lopez

After their film Gigli (2003), which cost $77 million to make and only recouped $7 million it was apparent

-- since you've put a comma before the parenthetical phrase "which cost $77 million to make and only recouped $7 million" you should have a comma after it as well.

many of the Lopez scenes were removed from the version of the film actually shown in order to hopefully persuade audiences to actually see it

- I think you could do without the "hopefully" and the second "actually":

many of the Lopez scenes were removed from the version of the film actually shown in order to persuade audiences to see it

a new, open burger joint -- this sounds a bit clumsy. You could say:
a newly opened burger joint
smiley - smiley G


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 3

Bluebottle

This is indeed the film with the Lord of the Rings reference.smiley - ok

I've made the changes and sadly removed the smiley - badger.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 4

Gnomon - time to move on

There's also the Mr Underhill LOTR reference in one of the other films


A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 5

Bluebottle

I had thought about that being Frodo's travelling name to Bree, however it is closer to a scene in film 'Fletch' (1985) in which Fletch encounters a rude, arrogant man called Ted Underhill and gets revenge by using his name and tab, just as Jay and Silent Bob encounter Todd Underhill and travel across the US by using his name and credit card. Kevin Smith has been trying to make a 'Fletch' film based on the original novels for decades.

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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

Post 6

Gnomon - time to move on

smiley - ok


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A87965879 - 'Clerks II' - the Film

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