A Soldier's Love
Poor Linda Lou was drowned in tears,
Having ignored her mother's fears,
She courting with a soldier, brave,
Who knew not how he should behave.
For though he'd said his love was true,
And that for her he'd all eschew,
He'd left a girl in Aldershot,
Who'd now turned up to claim her lot.
The soldier brave, who's name was Bill,
With two sweethearts, he now felt ill,
And didn't know which way to turn.
His lesson he would never learn.
Bill told his friend of his position,
And offered him the acquisition,
One of his two sweethearts, cheap!
Then, could not choose which one to keep.
His friend, who's name was Alfred Spink,
(He did not smoke, nor did he drink),
So filthy lucre had galore
With which to purchase Bill's spare chore.
I know what we will do, said Bill,
Though it will be a bitter pill,
I'll sacrifice my Linda Lou
Two hundred quid, and she's for you.
Albert dug in his pocket, deep,
Coughed up the cash, poor girl to keep.
'When do we meet,' (he'd now the right)
Said Bill, 'At flicks, tomorrow night.'
But now arrived what spoiled the scene,
For Alfred Spink was no girl's dream.
His hair was sparse, his nose looked fried,
And face with spots was well supplied.
'Oh mummy dear, what shall I do?'
Cried pretty little Linda Lou,
'This horrid man Bill's sold me to
Is ugly, smells, and just won't do.'
Sympathetic, her mum was not,
'My dear, you asked for what you've got.
Courting soldiers makes you fair game,
So cut your loss and start again!