h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Silently curses himself for revealing himself as (a) humourless and (b) not learning the entire Douglas Adams canon before visiting this site...

Resolves to flagellate himself mercilessly before retiring to his plank bed.

*googles flagellate and reads:*
*Having several long stout hairs on the cell surface which are used for locomotion or food gathering*
*wonders if he meant flog? sounds better for him anyway *

Flagellates himself to bed via the fridge.

*watches in awed interest*
*thinks to himself "Wow!"*

*wonders why everybody is raising eyebrows*

*Thinks surely we've got enough eyebrows by now*

*Wonders about coming out from under the table*

'Breezes into room' Hilda ogden style' With mop, bucket & rubber gloves.
"suspiciously eyes man in corner with sheep' 'Hand gestures to the floor' at mounds of deposits left by said sheep! 'Glares furiously' at man.
Notices large ammounts of water everywhere 'scans room' looking for the culprit, fixing gaze upon guilty looking female staring at the ceiling.
'sighs heavily' and proceeds to mop up the water. 'wonders' if this lot have escaped from a mental home! 'continues mopping'.....
Finishes mopping! 'thinks' thats better all nice and clean now.
'picks up mop & bucket' heads out the door and ((SLAMS)) it hard...

Walks in, billowing her pashmina, to everyone's annoyance. Glances rapidly around the room, smiling in such a friendly way everyone forgives the pashmina faux pas (actually I got in in a sale at M&S, and it's a scarf - not a pashmina).
Turns on her heel, and leaves the room.



Reappears with a stack of chairs.

Departs again.

Reappears (face flushed)with a couple of bags full of cans of beer, and a couple of boxes of wine (and plactic cups).Oh and some soft drinks for TTs present.

Sits on the floor, smiles at everyone, makes "tarrah" gesture towards drinks, opens beer...........


winks at Jimbo

*Smells the free from several continents away*

*Raises eyebrow (neatly braided!) in a gesture of thanks

Smiles thanks & takes some
Raises one eyebrow (moderation in all things) & wonders how a drinking session can be conducted without any speaking taking place.

*having consumed many free ..............

*raises eyebrows with difficulty and silently*

*spins in seat*

*Sees a mention of *

*Lurks hopefully*

*hands Unc an *

*wiggles eyebrows*

*spins in seat*

*thinks weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*

sticks thumbs in ears and wiggles fingers

*Pulls silly face*

farts silently

*accepts gratefully*

*Leans back in chair*

*Scrunches up nose on encountering sudden smell*

*Sniffs deeply of to rid nose of smell*

*grins at Unc*

*Decides is too full and sets about depleating the contents*

*Grins back*

Enters room carefully. Wipes forest mud from boots, looks around. Smiles at several known characters, then embarrassed to see he's been followed, shoos wild deer, fox and several badgers out of the door.
Grabs ale greedily, then recalls he's back in civilisation and raises little finger as slurps greedily.