h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Gladys hiccups and releases the cat amazingly unharmed.

wonders why Herrena is licking the cat

As she bundles Kasdog into a straitjacket, wonders why the poor chap is hallucinating.

realises that in this world he can do what he likes so....in one bound he was free!

Having spent some time with wife and children returns and finds nothing much has changed in his absence.

Gets out a cat's cradle.

...and scarecrow supplies, old shabby suit and beat up old hat, straw for tucking around ankles, wrists, waistline and throat, push-pins for securing hat to pumpkin that goes over head, strings up scarecrow in cats cradle, summons neighborhood kids too poke at it with sticks and throw things...

Kasdog realises that he's been dressed up for some sort of game - how exciting...

Being really grateful for the smart(compared to his own) new clothes kasdog deftly avoids missiles thrown by feral children and strides jauntily out of the kitchen and heads for the nearest pub for a glass of and a

Meanwhile, Herenna finds a sack of freshly made sausage rolls and scotch eggs (delivered by the local butcher) and a prechilled jereboam of vintage champagne just by the door. They look okay...

hesitates at the door of the pub, wonders if Herenna will share the booze and grub with him then remembers herenna is impervious his astonishing good looks, undoubted charm, supreme intelligence and innate modesty and is probably trying to poison him, so gives a cheerful wave and goes into the pub

Kasdog really is missing a treat here, and there are so few others around to share it...

feels really tempted but is suspicious of Herenna's intent as it is unusual for her to be pleasant, kasdog has not forgotten Gladys

Gladys is alive and apparently playing a strange game of football against 3 baby mice and 6 bluebottles. There were more playing against her, but that was before she ate the referee.

This really is good stuff.

thinks if Gladys is alive he might forgive Herenna and join her in a glass of as long as his glass is not poisoned

Nominates Liquidwarrior as poisontaster - such hardship for good and harmless champagne and scotch eggs.

watches with horror as liquidwarrior takes a sip of foams at the mouth and falls to the floor in agonising fit and shouts to herenna for the promised antidote.

Points out that haven't got antidotes the champagne wasn't poisoned. Tells liquid warrior to stop messing around and spit out the soap capsule which they must have decided to chew for a joke.

Liquid Warrior sits up, spits out the soap, and at kasdog.

shakes head at L.W. glares at Herenna and stalks off in search of a single lady who will not try to seduce him with and