A Conversation for A Brief History of Girlguiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Kat - From H2G2 Posted Jul 20, 2005
Yeah you might as well sit back and chill. The update forum is much more flexible than Peer Review because things aren't picked by scouts, they are just picked up by the italics when they can.
I'll have a read through this as soon as I can I promise.
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 21, 2005
*sits back and chill's*
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
*changes the music*
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Kat - From H2G2 Posted Jul 22, 2005
Ahhh you still swap between past and present tense throughout the dates section! If I was you I would pick one and go with it. Present tense seems to do well for these things I think.
"Cadets were separated from Rangers and came under the Training Department. This was decided at the World Conference."
World conference for who?
"Look Wider (a new programme) is lunched for the Senior Section and a new promise and promise badge is launched for all sections."
You're still lunching Look Wider!!
You know how Emmily told you how to put in the links as references at the bottom of the entry? That's completely correctly done, well done. However, and I'm not sure what the policy on this usually is but I *always* do it, it might be a good idea to work those links into the text as well for everyone who is reading the entry on the computer (majority of us). Therefore the link to Rainbows can be put in the first time you mention them etc etc...
I've got to off now but this is looking good and really shaping up well
Kat
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
right done the best I can there
*sits around and waits*
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Vicki Virago - Proud Mother Posted Jul 22, 2005
The 1916 paragraph
After Schools (near the end of the paragraph) – put a ; instead of an , It reads better
Young Leaders paragraph.
You need to bring the comma in after Rainbows. There’s a gap there.
Paragraph “Rangers”
wears a aquamarine
needs to be “wears an” not “a”
Paragraph “Link”
Girlguiding needs to be separated - Girl Guiding
Same with the 1949 and the 1969 paragraphs.
The same is needed in the “More Information” Section at the end….
It’s much better to have continuity (more than likely, just an oversight)
Under 1938
The full stop after the word conference needs to be brought in a little.
1967 the R is missing out of Branch….
Finally, just have a look through to make sure all full stops are in the relevant place. There’s a couple of sentences at the top of the guide without any.
These are all just fiddly stuff, but you’d be asked to change them before it goes any further.
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 22, 2005
Kat, I suggested the Referenced links as that was the way they were in the original Entry, and it was the easiest way for Mizzpinky. Now that they are worked into the text (I agree, is better that way) are the Referenced links now redundant, and should they be deleted?
Emmily
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
She would've said to take them out wouldn't she?
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 22, 2005
Mizzpinky, I have a couple of suggestions and GuideML changes, as well as something that doesn't look quite right, so bear with while I ask for advice.
>"1916 In 1916 the formation of senior" ~~>1916 The formation of senior etc. rather than repeating 1916.
Same para. Both read smoother when removing/adding 'the'.
>"room had to be made for the younger girls who also wished to join Guides." ~~>room had to be made for younger girls who also wished to join the Guides.
>"1917 Mrs Mark Kerr took on responsibility" ~~> 1917 Mrs Mark Kerr took on the responsibility
The quote from Mrs Mark Kerr should be like this, without the "double quotes"
The need for Senior Guides has been felt for a long time..... Any Guide over 16 is eligible for promotion to Senior Guides. It must be remembered that nearly all Senior Guides will have been working hard during the day and will want recreation in the evening. They should not therefore be encouraged to do badge work in the evenings; their time should be spent principally in games, singing, country dancing, and other occupation affording a complete change from their daytime employments.
I'll look at the rest later.
**Advice please**
Should all the years in Mizzpinky's list have : after them ( I can't remember what : are called )
Emmily
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 22, 2005
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Vicki Virago - Proud Mother Posted Jul 22, 2005
: = colon
; = semi colon
As you said about the year "1916" I would say something better with 1916: In this year.....etc
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
Right I've done that
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream Posted Jul 22, 2005
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Kat - From H2G2 Posted Jul 22, 2005
*bustles in looking important*
The reference tags aren't redundant because if worked into the text mobile users still can't see them, so by putting them in references they can. At least that makes sense in my head and is what I've been doing since we brought the references in.
Semi-colons good idea I think.
*bustles back out again looking important...but keeping an eye on Emmily*
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 22, 2005
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
echomikeromeo Posted Jul 22, 2005
But if the links are in reference tags *and* in the text, wouldn't they appear twice in the 'referenced entries/sites' box on the right side of the entry? And that would make at least one version of the links redundant.
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Kat - From H2G2 Posted Jul 23, 2005
I shall check....
Now I haven't a clue! Oh wait if I actually *try* it....
No it doesn't repeat and is on the safe side...which I always like to be on.
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again Posted Jul 23, 2005
*sits in the corner as the convo has suddenly gone over her head*
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
Kat - From H2G2 Posted Jul 23, 2005
Don't worry, ignore all of that if you like. It was just us being a bit techy and complicated about the links.
I'll have another read through of this when I get back from work today...yes work on a Saturday
Key: Complain about this post
A4113901 - A Brief History of Girl Guiding UK’s Senior Section (UK)
- 21: Kat - From H2G2 (Jul 20, 2005)
- 22: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 21, 2005)
- 23: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 24: Kat - From H2G2 (Jul 22, 2005)
- 25: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 26: Vicki Virago - Proud Mother (Jul 22, 2005)
- 27: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 28: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 22, 2005)
- 29: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 30: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 22, 2005)
- 31: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 22, 2005)
- 32: Vicki Virago - Proud Mother (Jul 22, 2005)
- 33: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 34: Emmily ~ Roses are red, Peas are green, My face is a laugh, But yours is a scream (Jul 22, 2005)
- 35: Kat - From H2G2 (Jul 22, 2005)
- 36: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 22, 2005)
- 37: echomikeromeo (Jul 22, 2005)
- 38: Kat - From H2G2 (Jul 23, 2005)
- 39: Mizzpinky *sighs* here we go again (Jul 23, 2005)
- 40: Kat - From H2G2 (Jul 23, 2005)
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