Malfueres Disrumptial

0 Conversations

Born Fuertes Rumptious in the outer reaches of the sheep's nose nebula Malfueres was a traveller at heart and a fool by brain.

Growing up on the seventh moon of the planet Backleglarg, Malfueres excelled in all Leglarg subjects. This was particularly simple for him as he was only Leglarg on his Auntie's side his primary DNA coming from his Arglarg Father in law (Arglarg, Leglarg and Kraazlarg geneaology is so complicated that even a Babel Fish gets confused when translating into human terms).

Needless to say Leglarg's lack the genetic material to automatically succeed unlike their Arglarg counterparts on the more affluent, and aesthetically pleasing fourth moon. Neither Kraazlarg, Blingarg, Prungarg, Hrungarg or Simplarg contribute much to society except for the Kraazlarg who despite being the first of the seven species to harness interstellar travel, had little or no inclination to travel beyond their horizons as the imagination gene needed to think beyond ones borders belonged exclusively to the Hrungargs. They kept themselves largely to themsleves as anything they could imagine within their mind was more favourable to anything their planet had to offer.

The Simplarg tend to the Hrungarg by draping themselves over their bodies and the Prungarg feed the Hrungarg by the unique fact that as a species they eat excretia and therefore excrete unspoiled gourmet food.

The Blingarg are used as currency between everyone else which suits them just fine as they are the only race in the sheep's nose nebula to be infintely stoic.

Fuertes was a particularly interesting example of cross breeding. The result of an orgy suggested in Eccentrica Galumbrit's newsletter (vol: squarg #groon) he inherited all the qualities of all races. He was in fact totally self-sufficent and therefore totally redundant as far as Backleglarg society was concerned.

After travelling for several centuries, the time alone not bothering such a stoic individual, Fuertes landed on Vortislew 9. Here he found the remnants of the galactic empire, a collection of creatures who had once been able to afford several Magrathean invoices and were now reduced to commenting on how common the other less rich races were and bemoaning how their delicate sensibilities prevented them from trafficking cheap porn on the sub-etha wavelength. Eccentrica Galumbrit and all her appendages are particularly abhorred.

So when the self confessed product of an appendage heavy vice-merchant revealed himself, they ran down such scorn and dissaproval upon him that he quickly became one of the most officious personalities in the universe. Changing his name to one of perpetual disgust Fuertes allyed himself with Unxious the Unflappable, against the integalactic tour of supernova past, present and future.

Bookmark on your Personal Space

Conversations About This Entry

There are no Conversations for this Entry



Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry

Written and Edited by


h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more