h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Truth comes out at odd hours and strange moments.
"There really are no bones in icecream" must be one I'd expect to hear from a child observing melting icecream.

It's is also something I'd like to wear,
in pale yellow letters accross a front of
a darkblue t-shirt. If such t-shirts are available,
let me know...

Ben & Jerry's is a popular brand of ice cream in the US that seems to make a point of putting heavy large crunchy chewy & sticky bits into icecream and making it a real chore to eat. Sometimes they seem like bones!

I think it's a puritannical way to actually eat ice-cream without enjoying it, and so it is guilt free.

when you have apple tart and ice cream it is also called tartan ice cream.

As a child, my aunt taught me how to make a interwoven lattice on top of an apple pie instead of a seal. Would it then be a tartan tartan ice cream?

I think you can make t-shirts at the dog's ear (a clothing store) but you might not have one where you live.

What causes ice cream shock - the headache after eating ice cream?

That's a good question. Maybe there's an entry you could research and write on that!