dealing with children while shopping

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Country to what seems to be popular belief in many of the UK's shopping centres that are the size of small moons. A small child who has been filled up with takeaway food and sunny delight. Is not the best thing to bring with you on a shopping trip. Now I am not a farther so I can’t be totally accurate in my appraisal in the situation. But I do think that when a child has had enough sugar to dissolve a bucket of teeth. That last place you want to take them is a shopping centre full of strange people and toys that you can’t have. I have seen people take up whole streets in malls with double prams kids on leads and strapped to there fronts and backs. All of which have been up since 6 to watch the tweenies, and if they want to watch the tweenies the parents want to watch the tweenies. Its now 12 a clock and tempers are getting frayed. Mums feet hurt, dad wanted a lie in and go to the pub and watch the footie, and the kids wanted to go and play. But instead they all are trapped in a giant concrete tomb of mass consumerism and what’s this coming round the corner?

It’s a man selling balloons.

It normally goes like this.

Child: can I have a power ranger balloon?
Mother: no you will just let go and it will float away.
Child: please!!
Mother: no there a waste of money.
Child: please mum I won’t let go of it this time.
Mother: no.
Child: (starting to go red and looking at ball of tatty balloons as if it’s the holy grail.) please, mum!!!
Father: no now forget it we are going home soon.
Mother: we will go home when I have finished. I haven’t been in Matlan yet.
Child: (now almost purple with rage.) PLEASE!!
Father: NO!
Child will now fall to floor face down and scream loud enough to attract the attention of all immediate area causing them to look and stare critically at the parents.
Father: ok ok ere mate, how much for you ninja ranger balloons.
Balloon seller: £5
Father: £5!! For a bloody balloon!!! (Screams getting louder) ok ok bloody rip ill tell you. Here you go boy.
In an almost miracle like transformation the child gets up take the balloon and they go on there merry way. It’s as your leaving the mall you see a balloon floating off into the sky, and a hi pitched screaming child being yanked buy the wrist towards a ford Orion.

So my only advise to people on how to deal with children in shopping centres.

Leave them with grandma

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