1 Conversation

A Townie is an unfortunate individual. This sub-species of what may loosely be termed humanity can be found in its natural habitat of small British towns with pretensions to metropolis-hood. They are often found in passive herds (correctly called 'swarms') on street corners and on benches where they remain still and discuss futile topics with low IQs. Come nightfall, they are transformed into beings of frenzied activity, patronising many pubs, clubs and public lavatories.

They communicate in monosyllabic grunts and should not be approached without protective gear. A Townie can be recognised by its regalia of designer (obscure) sportswear in vile (Nature's warning) colours, which it almost certainly cannot afford to obtain legitimately.

They can, in rare circumstances, become valued members of society, particularly in the trade of sewing mailbags.

Bookmark on your Personal Space

Conversations About This Entry



Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry

Written and Edited by


h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more