h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I guess there are two sorts of people.
Those taller than their girlfriends and those whose girlfriends can kiss them on top of the head.
The latter clearly suffer from such insecurity they feel bitterness at being made to do simple tasks like changing lightbulbs. But in the defence of the vertically challenged, only the former are arrogant enough to buy cheap lightbulbs that shatter when activated and then blame it on whoever screwed it in.

i didn't buy those cheep ones and it was screamadelica's screwing that was to blame! As for "fluffy head", well it's better than being kissed on it. I am not that short, at least not in this part of the world, for some reason everyone here is much shorter than back home.... must be something in the water.....

You are missing the point here. It is not the cheap lightbulb to blame but the tools one owns to make up for other inadequacies. A good screwing needs a good tool!!!!
When the tool is put to good use then the lightbulb will shine in an orgasmic manner!!!!

The above was written by a Ms. K. (taller than Screamadelica) abusing JR's account!

Oi!!!! are you trying to say that my tools aren't up to the required standard??

I would recomend bouncing on a Space Hopper to get to light bulbs. Someone is bound to get hurt trying it, so I won't though. Or, of course, you make use of one of the taller members of the society (we take both tall and small remember) to help you. Then again, you could just oppress an averagely heighted person into doing it. Ah, so many options, so few light bulbs.

There is another option: simply use candles or flashlights, which can both be lit at any height. They tend to be funner than conventional lighting techniques, as well!

A candle! On a space hopper! Are you mad? You'd spray wax everywhere!

Sunderland University is home of the National Hat Society (NHS.) Predictably enough, they wear stupid hats and get wasted. It's definitely a cool idea, but it's full of arses.

And how, pray tell, do you get a hat to sit on an arse? Surely they would get all crumpled when you sat down

Perhaps they skip the sitting and go straight to the prone position. I've seen people do that after imbibing heavily.

G7

I tend to miss that sight, having a disturbingly good record in the To Floor Dash. A distinct advantage to being short.

I'm usually too busy mixing and serving the drinks to actually get involved. It looks like so much fun, too...

G7