Gaerd this brig he said. Whare the hell is it goin tae go like? Ah,ve seen guid mates killt ur injuret dain crap duties like this. Ah'd like tae see Saergent bloody Mchendry stop a platoon o Natzis fae crossin here!
Sorry, Ah tak that back. That's the thing aboot this bloody madness, a'bodies priorities get aw skewed. Shair enough, a brig is o strategic importance, but shairly the thoosants that got killt gettin the bloody thing are anaw.
God it's cald. Stuck oot here in the back o beyond richt in the middle o winter anaw gaerdin a few wee stains across a burn certainly isnae ma idea o stickin it up Hitler whar it hurts.
Why am A writin this? Is it cos Ah think that Ah, Willie Wallace will be some sort o famous writer? Or is it just cos if Ah dinnae dae enythin then Ah'll catch the flamin madness that's goin roond.
Ah mean, Ah didnae really want tae come oot here tae freeze ma boz aff dodgin bullets. Whay would? At the ripe ald age o twenty three, Ah was deemed ald enough and fit enough tae get conscripted intae Her Maijesties Aermy. Torn fae Kirkcaldy, an ugly toon, lit up only by the smile ow Michelle Murray.
Ach Michelle, dae ye still long fur ma embrace as Ah dae yurs? Ah can still smell the fragrance oh yur hair and the perfume ye wore. Even the smell o the linoleum factories couldnae compete wi yur heavenly scents.
Ah wunder what yur dain noo? Are ye sittin wurried aboot me? Are ye cuddellt up in somwan else's airm, some lucky sod that didnae get sent tae be killt on some strangers fairm.
Ah hae tae stop this maudlin, it's dain ma heed in. Ah wish Ah wuz hame though, wi ma maws hame made broth and scones waftin their scents throo the hoose. Ma old man wi his pipe and baffies, wi an opinion on a'thin, wether he ken't enythin or naw. And wee Jimmy, ma best pal.
Ah hope tae God yur no o'wer here Jimmy, ye were never eny guid in a ficht. Thank Christ, here's ma relief. Ah can catch some kip noo and stop depressin masel.
Hang aboot, these blokes look new tae me! They're crossin fae the bloody wrang side. The're bloody Natzis. Ah hope tae God ye hae foond somwan else Michelle, cause Ah'd be nae guid tae ye noo!