h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Having read through Mother of God, Empress of the Universe's 'Questions for God' don't you think we should give 'God' the chance to answer?
The rules are simple:
1. The question must have appeared in 'Questions for God'
2. Quote the question before answering it.
Here's a few to get the ball rolling:

Question -I'd ask him which church actually *is* the only way to heaven.

Answer - None of them - Churches are man's creation. It's the way you live that gets you to Heaven

Question - Where do all the "other" socks go?
Answer - They get shredded and flushed down the drain by the washing machine.

Question - Do suicides go to hell?
Answer - No. They seem to be trying to leave it.

Question - Has anyone ever told you you look like Charlton Heston?
Answer - I think you're confusing me with Moses. Most people seem to think I look like Morgan Freeman.

Question - Why did you make so much suffering and strife in the world?
Answer - You are forgetting the scale of eternity. A little suffering is only a trifle inconvenience in eternity and gives your imortal soul something to talk about later.

You seem to be posting in the "wrong" place - at least from the point of view of expecting other people to have read what you have read or attracting lots of people to reply. Posting back on The Forum, A1146917, or on <./>Askh2g2</.> would seem to be more appropriate.

Meanwhile though, you haven't specified any particular god and, under the current circumstances, whether it's one which has "don't panic" as a motto. "Don't panic" might sound more plausible coming from some types of gods than others, eg Cthulhu wouldn't be at all convincing advising it (though it would probably be too late by then anyway).

I think the "Don't Panic Help Centre" is the *prefect* place to post "Answers from God".

Not *his* fault if nobody's paying much attention.


hehehehehehe