I think my warranty voided itself!
This will not be on the test, but it is important for your future education.
It will come as no surprise to anyone reading this column for any length of time that I don't quite see things exactly the same way anyone else might.
While I have been accused of deliberately taking a contrary or sideways view of things, I have become convinced that too many people are incapable of thinking outside the pack.
It is October and Halloween is almost upon us, but the stores are already filling up with the Christmas crap.
It is not unusual for a sort of depression to cast a pall over preparations for Christmas, but I think it is a bit much for it to begin in October.
I am depressed that people are casting about for stuff to throw at other people, for both Halloween and Christmas.
I am depressed that costumes and candy for Halloween are crowding the shelves cheek by jowl with decorative gewgaws and candy and toys for Christmas.
I am depressed that both 'holidays' were originally 'Pagan' observances that I don't think had the same ring of commercialism and 'gimme' that they do today, although I could be wrong.
The grasping nature of humans knows no culture or time.
I am depressed that there is no worldwide holiday that has meaning for every person on the planet.
I am depressed that little green (well, some of them still are) pieces of paper are travelling faster and faster out of wallets that are getting emptier and emptier.
I am depressed that almost all of the crap I saw, with the exception of the candy, came from factories in China, where, with very few exceptions, they don't celebrate Christmas and Halloween. What must the people in the factories that churn out this bright plastic crap think about that stuff, or us?
And, finally, I am depressed because I don't know anything about the holidays they celebrate in China or if the people who work in those factories will get time off to join in them.