Vegemite is probably the most disgustingly tasting semi-edible sandwich spread in the world. Its claim to fame is that it can get Australian kids to eat it, and forever have them think that it is nice.

Vegemite is a yeast extract that is very dark brown, closer to black, and smells horrid. Vegemite is very viscous, and even if an open jar of it were turned upside down, one would not have to worry about a mess on the bench for closer to 100 years.

A jar of Vegemite will out live any human being on the planet. Though it is made from vegetable matter, somehow in the process of making it becomes some form of pseudo-lifeform. This can be seen when going through the cupboards that haven't been cleaned for 5 years, the only thing worth keeping is the Vegemite, but this is counter balanced by the fact that there is about 5 bottles in there.

Most international tourist have had heard about Vegemite, or their hosts tell them about it when they arrive. However the story they initially hear is wrong. It goes on about how nice it is to eat, and that you just have to try it to believe it. A warning to such tourist, do not believe the Australian locals. They only want to see the expression on your face when you bite on your Vegemite on toast, in which the Vegemite is close to half a centimetre thick. This is a long running jokes that Australians play on unsuspecting tourist.

That brings us to the next point about how much you should have if you plan to eat it. On a single slice of toast, the bare minimum should be used. Unlike a normal sandwich where you have 2 slices of bread to cover the flavour, on toast the slightest amount of Vegemite can be very strong. The only thing known that also goes well with Vegemite is cheese. The cheese is used to disguise the flavour of Vegemite.

Australian kids are brought up on Vegemite right from the time they start sucking on a dummy. Many parents wipe a bit of Vegemite on the dummy and give it to the child. In some countries this would be considered cruelty to children, the reason for this is that the parents would most likely not go anywhere near Vegemite, even with a 10 foot barge pole.

The act of giving a child a dummy with Vegemite on it gives the child a mind set that it tastes nice. So for the next 15 to 18 years, the child's parents will forever be buying Vegemite to feed an insatiable appetite of the child for Vegemite. When the child becomes about 15, he or she starts to discover that Vegemite is not the be all and end all and just over one night, as if by magic, they decide they hate Vegemite.

The act of parents actually feeding their child Vegemite early on also means that Vegemite will continue to live on an Australian icon. Sadly though, it is made by Kraft that is own by an American Tobacco company.