h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Look, everybody just calm down and have a glass of water

a water free glass for me.

*takes a knapp*

I am scratching my nose.

I've been online now for 11 hours straight

I'm scratching my ...

I have inappropriate impulses.

I'm sorry Sat but I find that interesting - drope me a line and we'll talk about that one some more so we don't get off topic here

Oh no. It would outrage and disgust you...

I'll tell you a tale in return - I have a very open mind and this is far too exciting for this thread, come on over to my place and we'll chat in private

Dirty boy!

I rest my case now please, let's talk about it elsewhere and let this thread get back to it's mindless tedium

*gives him a look*

I am sat in a chair. I am falling asleep. I am breathing air.

I'm watching the closing credits of a film on Channel 4

I saw those same credits... how not .

I am eating a sandwich.

My mother's coming down the stairs to let the cat out

I've not been back from the pub too long.
Drank two kinds of real ale. But only, for the reason taht they run out of the one I started drinking first, Normally I wouldn't dream of doing anything so exciting as having two different ales on a single night, I might collapse and get overexcited, who knows.
I've just eaten two dinner rolls with Brie and salid, and a white bread (I didn't order white bread, was a substitution for Rhye bread, and multigrain wholemeal bread), sandwich with salid and cockles, with fresh ground black pepper.
I've also drunk a cup of coffee since I returned from the pub, that was* very exciting I can say....
I've smoked a ciggerette as well, and might do so again soon.
This is me, I'm, at a computer, I'm listening to Elvis, but he knew that before the door closed to the back of the disaster area that is not over yonder hill.
I wasn't the second gun man, and I've never been on a grassy knoll..
The window is still open, I like the fresh air.
Someone tried to trip me up in the pub, they failed, usless to**** I might sleep soon, waht with all this excitment.

I have just laughed at 2legs' wit and humour. And canot stop thinking of him as having a mullet and a moustache.

Oh, witt and humour, things I used to have, left them at a pub, on the 25th of March 2001, they claimed they couldn't find 'em, so I never got 'em back sometimes I make myself laugh, which is bad, cause once started I'm tricky to stop Hysterical laughter doesn't do my breathing too much good... <laugh. I've not got a mullet But I do have a faulse moustache I wore it earlier in the pub... No one recognized me