Deerstalker

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Defined in two ways. Firstly, a man who stalks deer. This is always a man as women are far too sensible. Secondly, as the hat worn by the man while he stalks the aforementioned deer.

This hat is usually made of a checked material and is probably most recognisable as the hat worn by one Sherlock Holmes, although it must be stressed that there is no evidence to suggest that Holmes himself ever engaged in the stalking of deer. A further notable feature of this hat are the two pieces of fabric that can be folded down around the head to keep the ears warm, or make your voice louder.

The latter of these is one of the less obvious consequences of utilising this feature of the Deerstalker and is sourced from the same logic as the vocal volume increase caused by the use of a personal stereo. Another of the less obvious consequences of the Deerstalker is that, when in the folded-down position, it makes you look like an utter fool.

This has lead some parties to speculate that the reason the Deerstalker is so used by deerstalkers is because of the hat's ability to guarentee even the most glamorous and charismatic, a place in the 100 Most Ridiculed People on the Planet. And while the deer is giggling uncontrollably at the sight Deerstalker, the deerstalker is able to blow a hole through it's chest with a gun.

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