Holding Court At The Palais

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Flowers in a watering can

Holding Court At The Palais

Oh hello Marcia! So sorry you couldn't join us at the Gala Preview for the Hampton Court flower show last night. I do hope the leg is feeling better. Nasty little operation the vein one, and of course you couldn't possibly have walked so soon after it. Six weeks is barely a moment.

Hold on a mo just have to swap hands... Yes I'm in the beauty parlour... manicure...

The coral I think... no not you Dahling, I'm talking to Lucinda... yes sweetie isn't she? Marcia says hello Lucinda. Lucinda says hello back Marcia.

I have to say you missed a treat. It was an absolute delight. The women were beautifully dressed... well, those with money at any rate. There were a few poor people in last years' numbers and some, can you believe... even wore jeans! But no one spoke to them so that was all right.

Yes the weather was marvellous! How clever of the organisers to keep the rain away, unlike last year when the entire site was a bog garden. Do you remember? Daphne looked priceless in her Nicole Fahey number with the hunters but such a good idea. My shoes were completely ruined.

What? Oh colour... cream Dahling, without doubt the colour to be seen in. So many pretty little floaty numbers with lots of frothy lace and shoes that looked divine... no doubt crippling - but looked divine.

Toes too I think Lucinda.

Handbags were the 'must have' accessory, dinky little boxy numbers in floral prints, barely capable of holding a credit card let alone a lipstick, but perfectly matched to the hats. I'm sure I saw one woman wearing precisely the same outfit she had on at Henley the day before. How clever, it worked perfectly.

And it was good to see that the men had taken the dinner jackets out of mothballs... they do cover such a multitude of indulgence. Even those opting for alternative jackets looked wonderfully witty. Delicious little ties, bought by their wives no doubt, that perfectly complemented the hand bags... such sweet attention to detail. I spotted at least three white dinner jackets. Rather risqué for Surrey, so much more at home in Cannes one feels, but it worked, in a nouveau riche sort of way.

No no the champagne was fairly average; always is though and the hamper that Douglas had prepared had tuna pasta... dreadful of course... fish in that heat, but the melon and strawberries were actually rather delicious. He'd put some kind of alcohol in it naturally, totally unrecognisable of course. He claimed it was Moet... I think Cava more likely, but that's men for you... He did try and he bought the tickets, so one has to make allowances.

Some of the villagers were there as well. Not quite sure how they managed to get tickets. I thought these 'do's' were screened. Frightful people; they didn't stop moaning. We had the misfortune to be seated close to a group of them... Shop keepers my dear... Can you imagine? They went on and on about how awful they thought the Flower show was. They complained about the cones outside their houses. They said that no one could get to their shops for a whole week and that they couldn't get any deliveries out or any supplies in. One of them even thought it was a 'disgrace' that they didn't at the very least get free tickets and I believe I heard the word 'compensation' mentioned... imagine? How ridiculous! The flower show is the only thing that makes the dreadful little village bearable, Oh and the music festival that's rather fun.

Who was there? The usual you know. Virginia looked rather stunning in blue... yes Bottomley... well I think it was her but it was getting dark. Oh and the Bannisters of course. Yes you do know them. He was in a television programme. Oh she looked divine but then she always does... so slim, makes you want to spit.

Take my card Lucinda... yes poppet they're super as always... you clever little kitten.

Marcia I really have to go... What? Oh yes they did have the fireworks... wonderful but we were a little tipsy by then... No Douglas didn't fall into the Long water this year, what a relief!

The flowers? Oh heavens we didn't have time to actually look at anything, far to busy catching up, besides I'm back there tomorrow, members day remember? Thought I might wear the mauve... allium seems to be the flower of the season and, oh heaven's I can't wear the mauve with coral... Lucinda we're going to have to start again poppet.

Useless Hound

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