American and Indian Cafe

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Painful, but in a Good Way

A novel little restaurant located in "downtown" Harrisonburg, this is truly the most likely place any soul (or non-soul-bearing entity) could hope to find authentic Indian cuisine in the mountains of Virginia. Bear in mind that, while the US is known for having a wide variety of mediocre foods from around the world, the town of Harrisonburg has managed to remain neatly isolated from most things originating from outside it's valley home. Good food, especially.

A surprisingly good non-alcoholic drink is available here. It’s called a luscy, comes in a glass that is far too small, and has been described as tasting roughly like the milk leftover after finishing a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

An interesting tidbit about this place is that dishes containing meat are available. This is interesting only because the owner/proprietor of the cafe is an honest to goodness immigrant from India that also happens to be a practicing Hindu. This means he can't eat meat. Or, rather, he won't eat meat. Most meat, leastwise. Especially not cow, because he could very well be eating his own grandmother reincarnated as one of our bovine friends, or so I gather. It would be considered sacrilegious to eat Grandma (not to mention awkward).

However, within the confines of his restaurant it is perfectly acceptable for the rest of us to eat his granny, in cow, pig, or chicken form. You can best do this by ingesting itty-bitty bits of charred cow alongside rice, spice, and assorted veggies. Your meal will be spiced to your liking, on a spice scale of one to four, where one is hot enough to liquefy asphalt and four would be downright rude. The end result of all this is that the masticating worshipper (you) suddenly finds him/her/itself to be tearing profusely - perhaps from the moving religious experience - and totally without sinus congestion. This may be due in part to the fact that all mucus membranes are instantly melted away by either the intense pain caused by the abundant curry, ginger, and other spices or the constantly streaming tears.

This is of course considered quite enjoyable and is highly recommended.

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