h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've been told by people that I'm far too polite sometimes. Usually when I ask if I can join them during lunch, or saying that I don't want to intrude if they ask me out.

Is it possible to be 'too polite'?

I believe the correct term is either snob or annoying stuck up guy. get it all the time, I have good posture, chew with my mouth closed, never talk with my mouth open and wonder why everyone else doesn't.

I think superplonker is referring to being too nice. I don't know if one can be too polit, but one can definitely be too nice. I am. I just earlier tonight spent 30 minutes waiting and getting angry at a fast-food restaurant, but when the lady came out and told me she had completely forgotten about me, I just smiled, took my food, and left...

It can really be a problem sometimes. When people ask me where I want to eat, for example, I can never decide, I always want to leave it up to the other person... but my boyfriend is exactly the same way. We can be hungry and still take forever just trying to decide which side of town (his or mine) to meet and find a place to eat...

indecisiveness and unassertiveness many suffer.

Just be careful in being super polite that the accrued injustices that go unanswered don't lodge in your psyche and become a ticking time bomb. I've seen too many very nice people go right off the edge when the straw that broke the camel's back came along. It seems better to blow off a little steam as you go, rather than sucking it all in. You can politely say, "That was pretty inconsiderate. I hope you don't make it a habit," or something as innocuous, and get it out then, not later. Or, you could just perform your own little audition for the Jerry Springer show right on the spot. Whatever. Just don't let it build up...

just relax... previous weeks topic.

"Just don't let it build up..."

MUCH easier said than done, when that part of your brain says, "It's not worth saying anything, that'll just cause more drama, just leave it be..."

I believe in politeness.

I do have a bit of an uneasy distrust of folks that NEVER seem to get mad or sad.
That cannot be healthy
I always wonder if they're gonna blow big when they do!
Seems to me,if you put 2 *too nice* of people together ~ it could eventually be dangerous to their health.

No one can hold out forever!Can they?

Those are the sort of people you hear on the news killing 300 people with a chainsaw. it's the quiet ones that get you

Yep

So stay loud and stay normal!

It's been my experience that sometimes people are SO POLITE that they end up being completely rude.

The french

in fact, it was the English

in fact, it was the English

Isn't it just so much fun to spit your food out and forgo the entire process of untensils around people who are "too polite"?

What could be better!?

May I say, Jodan, that you are just being totally silly and not giving this 'too polite' forum the gravity and sincerity that it surely deserves?

I apologize.

You can never be 'too polite'. Politeness is treating other people with the same respect you would like to have shown to yourself.

Ever had sour- faced till operator? Try a smile on your face as you start unpacking your trolley, look them in the eye with friendliness and say "Good morning/afternoon! Have you had a busy day?" or something else about them. I have yet to have a single one that has not smiled in return and talked to me as they attend to my purchases.

As to being too nice - people do this all the time. Being 'too nice' means cowardly avoiding / not confronting unaceptable or unpleasant situations. Bad service? If you just stay away next time, the person trying to fix the problem won't know what to fix. Result? Another person just trying to make a go of a business goes under, taking creditors down with them. Innocent, nice polite people lose their jobs and a family goes hungry

Take yourself for example - if you had an avoidable personal problem (body odour, bad breath, poor dress sense) would you prefer people to be 'nice' and say nothing to you, or would you prefer a polite factual critique of how they experience the problem?

Next time when you get poor service at the shop, ask to speak to the manager, supervisor etc. Start off by telling them what they are doing RIGHT and only then tell them what your impression of the problem is. e.g. "Your shop is so convenient to get to and the quality of your produce is always good! Do you think that you could try get your assistants to smile - it would make shopping here so much more satisfying?" If you have a problem with the supervisor, they also have a supervisor/manager/owner - go there with your comment. If you have a problem with the owner, tell them and then go elsewhere, or shuttup and accept it!