A Conversation for Advice on Coming Out

who to come out to first

Post 1


this is more of a bookmark for now, but tommorow i will have a bit to say.
first off for now i just want to say that the person i first came out to was my big sister

who to come out to first

Post 2

Inanna has a theory - it could be bunnies.

I picked a sympathetic gay male friend as the first person I came out to... and his reaction was the classic "Oh, I've been wondering when you'd realise".

It was good, because he made an effort to find nice lesbians for me to meet smiley - smiley and offered to take me clubbing and so on. Plus, because he'd been through the whole coming out thing too, he was able to give me support etc in that.

Can I also flag up that, at least in the UK, the Lesbian and Gay switchboard are an excellent source of information about local groups, any events, meetings, etc. They're also generally good people to talk to about the whole coming out process. They're open 24 hours a day on 020 7837 7324, and have a website at http://www.llgs.org.uk/

who to come out to first

Post 3


i am going to just tell the story of how i determined that for sure i was at least bi, if not gay if no-one minds

i has been efeminate from since i can remember, i have always cried easily and have often been the butt of efeminate jokes because of it. when my sister came out and declared she was bi, it did not really phase me. a few years later i had a good relationship with this guy i know(a best friend kind of relationship) and i had sleep overs often with him. one night we were sleeping in the same bed because there was only one bed open. and he was sleeping but i was not. i think he was dreaming, but he began to carress my face, so i did the same. he then tried to push his thumb into my mouth, i thought, why not adnopened my mouth. i put mine in his andsmiley - blush... well, i will get to the point, we kissed and i really enjoyed it, and i consciously knew he was male and i enjoyed that, well then i came out to my bi sis and later another friend from the same place where my best friend lives, and finally to a friend where i currently live, and then to my best friend and later my mom, and recently my whole family

who to come out to first

Post 4

Cupid Stunt

Thats sweet!

I was 10 years old when I realised I had a crush on a guy. I feel left out in a way, because in most of the other stories I've read, the subject always realises they are gay when they get a kiss. Anyway, I was fine for a year after that, not telling anyone, not even knowing exactly what I was, because they just don't mention it in sex education, until I got to secondary school, where the verbal abuse started. I spent a year in denial, then just got on with it. I kept it a secret until I was 15, when I told my best friend at the time.
Confusing conversation:
You might be subconciously gay.
*in full carpe diem mode* I am gay.
No you're not.
He was really good about it after he got over the initial surprise (shock?). One by one all my other freinds accepted me for what I am, and I really am left wondering what I thought all the fuss was about. Its scary at the time, but worth it when you're free to be yourself completely. I'm 18 now, out to all my freinds and none of my family. It's amusing now, I hear on the grapevine that people who used to dish out the insults have trouble beleiving that they were right!

who to come out to first

Post 5

Demon Drawer

I found it easiest ot come out first onlline. And the guys here at h2g2 were the first to find out. I actually had a second identity on here for a while and who was as prolific a poster as Demon Drawer, and because DD was heavliy involved in the community I didn't feel I could drag him inot some of the discussions that were going on into the who gay debate without dragging something off everything that DD stood for, naive I know, but I was in Northern Ireland.

Anyway one night on line I confessed that the second identidy was me and nothing gave it a second thought then followed coming out to my freiends, work colleagues, parents, fellow bowlers, and then I meet Fashion Cat, annother researcher here, and had to tell them all I was in a relatinship with someone of the opposite sex, then engaged to that person and intending to spend the rest of my life with her. SO there you go. smiley - smiley

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