A Conversation for Being a Non-residential or Single Parent
doing it totally alone
little_miss_stroppy_knickers Started conversation Dec 17, 2004
i'm not a typical lone parent, well not one that i've come across before anyway! lol! i am sure there are others out there in my position though and i know how tough it is.
i'm on my own with no support or real friends. i'm a bit of a loner and find making friends difficult. in the virtual world i have dozens of mates, and mates across the country, but none that i chill out with near to home. i also have no access to a babysitter, so i never get the chance to go out of an evening and do my own thing like all these parenting guides insist you do! i find it so frustrating that no one seems to think that parents such as myself exist, it's all so easy to say " oh just get a babysitter, and go out and have a lovely time!" no way! lol!
i love my daughter to bits, she is my world and i thank the great whoever everyday for having blessed my life by sending her to me. i wouldn't change a thing, i am happy as a piggy in mud, and there isn't a day that goes by that i have ever found myself resenting her. when i conceived her i knew i had to leave the relationship for personal reasons that i don't feel able to divulge on here, i also knew that i would be alone as i am not close to my siblings and both my parents are no longer living.
you just get on and do it, don't you?! you have no choice. she is my gift, she is beautiful, she makes my world a much more wonderful and magical place, and if i am to be alone of an evening for the foreseeable future, then i'm happy with that. (now if i could just sort out her father! lol! )
it's why i've arrived here!
so, am i the only one, or does anyone else out there know where i'm coming from?
doing it totally alone
Billy60 ... Posted Dec 17, 2004
Hi Stroppy ...
Hope this doesnt mean you have a down on the male world .... some of us are ok ...
I have been divorced some 9 years now and have paid my CSA on the dot each month ... my two lads always used to come and stay with me . though the eldest (now 18) has other things on his mind ..
The youngest (15) still comes out each weekend and we play Golf or go to the pictures (even occasionally the Theatre ) ...
I was even in a relationship for 5 years after I was married ... that came to an end a couple of years ago .... we still share a mortgage And I still give her some money to keep the mortgage going (does that make me good or ??? ) ...
I love my boys to death and would anything for them .... I have seen the struggle that single parents go through and appreciate how hard it can be ...
So good on you
Billy The Pirate Fan.
doing it totally alone
little_miss_stroppy_knickers Posted Dec 17, 2004
hiya billy! yes and no, i'm not much of a fan of the guys at the moment, but don't take it personally! just having a real bum deal with my little one's dad. solicitors are involved now, dodgy ground to chat on here about it all, but it's going to get nasty. something that i really don't need. he's left me with a lot of emotional scarring so it will be a while before i venture out on the dating scene. besides lolly is only just gone 1 so i do have my hands full at the moment, i'm still adjusting to the drastic life changes.
sounds like you're one of very few decent guys billy. it's nice to see that people can still be civil at the end of a relationship. this is my first experience where i've not been able to move on cos he's held me back, but i'm dealing with that now. i left him when i was 3 months pregnant. in fact, aside from the fact that lolly would have been affected had we stayed together, it's much easier for me to parent her alone than if i'd stayed with him. i couldn't have coped in the relationship with him and a small baby.
i just find it so frustrating that people seem to think i'm pulling their leg when i say i have no one to turn to. it sometimes makes me feel a bit of a failure as a mother, but there again i think that has something to do with the way she was brought into the world.
anyway, as i said in my original thread, you have to get on and do it! parenting isn't easy for anyone, single, married, whatever, but it's wonderful and not to be sniffed at!
doing it totally alone
Billy60 ... Posted Dec 17, 2004
Well I hope you will consider me a friend ....
You can find me on here most nights from 10pm .... cos I work permanent nights .... probably why I am on my own ... .
My favourite Thread on here should you fancy popping in ... though its quiet tonight is the 'Ye Olde Knocking Shoppe' Thread ... some very nice and at times very funny people in there ..
If you want to talk away from here you can E-Mail to [email protected] ..... but only if you like ..
By the way ....
I'm Chris
doing it totally alone
little_miss_stroppy_knickers Posted Dec 18, 2004
hey chris, cheers mate, that's a lovely welcome to the site, once i've got my bearings a bit more i'll look up your thread, sounds a good laugh i only joined tonight, although i've been aware of the site for about a year now, just never got round to joining. glad that i did now. i'm not comfy revealing my real name, but call me gallykins, that's what most of my mates call me
i too worked permanent nights for a number of years, so yes, it does affect the love life! lol! mind you when i did get one it suffered dramatically when i stop working nights! didn't say much for that relationship, eh?! lol!
right well, i think i'm away to bed now, far too late for me really considering i've only had 3 hours sleep.
hope to catch up with you again soon chris.
take care mate
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