h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My sentiments exactly. I was just referring to the joke.

Yes. It must be a guy thing.

H'mm

No threats issued against my person.
No converts back to the true path.

Must reconsider strategy.
(Retires wondering which wound to lick first.)

"True Path"? What is that here?.......More "Topic Drift"!?LOL

I got a true story about Spitoons.....but I can promise you....no one wants to hear it....h**l.....I wish I didn't *remember* it!!!

NM

Would it make you feel better if I threatened to chase after you with a squirtgun filled with spit plaguesville?

Eh, lass!

It's a long time sin' I 'ad the chance to run away, very slowly, from any sort of female let alone an attractive flightless bird neatly attired in a dinner jacket. (Sigh) And the only reason I'd stir my stumps is the contents of the "squirtgun" (which I assume to be a "water pistol").

If you remember, I became a researcher on the specific understanding that I should be spared that particular unpleasantness.

(Upon reflection, feels his resolve weakening.)
(Then, not without some regret, pulls himself together.)

squirtgun, water pistol, whatever. there are worse things that have been shot out of those guns, and they guy ended up in prison.

Can't imagine anything worse.

Serve 'em all right!

It was worse. But lets not get into that.

If there is one thing that I find less attractive than spitting, it's people like Penguin Girl and Fairly Strange who hint that they have something or know something which is bigger, or better, or worse, or smaller than that which has just been revealed.
Not that there are any people like PG or FS.
I shall wake up presently back in the world where folk sick to arrangements they freely enter into, and don't whinge about being prevented from indulging in antisocial behaviour. Then I shall have tattooed on my forehead: "Do not put fried mackerel in the hole beneath!"
That should solve the problem.

I did of course mean
"sTick to arrangements ..."

(S. Freud, where are you when I need you?)

.....My "one up-manship" tale involves my own family(hillbilly) when I was a boy of 8, a large coffee can used as a spitoon, a 3 year old cousin, and what he considered a very enjoyable plaything.

Now...if you really wish for me to go into detail, I will....although, reluctantly.........

I think your imagination will have pretty much covered the reality by now!

NM

It's trying not to.

(Hey, been looking around.
How is your "Dart"? Fully recovered I trust.
I don't suppose we're talking Daimler Dart V8 2 seater, are we?)

With a family history like yours I would have thought we'd be on the sane side (not to mention same side) in this thing. Or are you of the "my cousin ... and it never did him any harm" persuasion?

Having said that.
I had not thought of the following in this connection but
(remembers previous reference to S. Freud)
When my daughter was about 12 months old she had been in the garden (back yard) with her mother while I was in the house. I heard a noise in the kitchen and went to investigate. I found the child spitting and began to remonstrate gently:
("You disgusting little brat I suppose you're copying that fat cow of a mother ...")
when mother entered and we both noticed a (by English standards) medium/small beetle on the floor coated in spittle. Either our toddler was a very good shot or she had assumed it was a smartie (like M & Ms) with legs.
Aged 16 now, she is not happy whenever we mention this story to her new friends. I'm saving the peanut story for her wedding reception.

Has your cousin cosidered submitting his view on this matter?

Nope....it may not have done my cousin any harm, but it sure messed up my day!!!

Sorry...the Dart is an American model.....MOPAR(Chrysler/Plymouth). I suppose it *could* be called a "Daimler", since Daimler bought(Merged ) with Chrysler!

The Dart is a highly modified 32 year old 4 seat "economy" car.......well....it was an economy car 'til I got through with it!LOL

It is amazing the stories we can tell on our younger relatives! I've found it best to hold on to them as "surprises" for use at the most inoppertune times!!!

NM

No. That's not a good idea.

I could back that up with info. from S. Freud's Totem and Taboo, but it would get pretty icky.

The reason I haven't described the details of my particular story is because I think it's in really bad taste, not something I particularly want to disciss, was brought up by a particularly perverted aquaintance of mine, and I couldn't come up with a tasteful way to change the subject.

Yeah, Yeah.

We have a saying, up north, "All mouth and trousers." invariably applied to men.
Never really thought I'd need a female version of it.

WE have a saying "down south"........but I can't use it here!

NM

Ah!
Hadn't considered it in that context.
I'm sure that this unfortunate train of thought is that Penguin Girl's fault but I can't really work out how to convince anyone else.

Spitting is only in bad taste in polite company. Which I definately am not.