A Conversation for Asthma

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Post 1

Prez HS (All seems relatively quiet here)

An excellent dissertation on asthma, this piece, directed both at the general public and at the actual sufferers. very good hands-on info, and nice illustrations.

However. The article is ill-structured, not in its question-like headers, but on the whole. the relation between paragraphs is not easy to digest, and reads like one long FAQ-sheet, or worse, a rant.

What you need first of all, with such a long article with so many paragraphs with their own header, is a TOC, a Table of Contents.
How hard can it be? You list all the paragraph headers at the top, hyperlinking each one to its place in the article. So the reader with a specific interest in "Who gets asthma?" clicks there and goes straight to that paragraph.

It also gives you an inkling of how long the article actually is, preventing what happened to me: I just started reading at the top, and discovered how long it was only when I started to get tired...
Had I known what to expect by means of a TOC, I probably would have read on.


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Post 2

Metal Chicken

Seconded! Hugely informative article but a bit too lengthy to read through in one gulp.


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Post 3

Lonnytunes - Winter Is Here

An article I wrote about asthma lives at http://www.h2g2.com/A429914

The yarn takes a more global view. Not containing as much info as this one, it is written in a more "user-friendly" style.

Maybe, one day, the two versions will be linked together....


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Post 4

Metal Chicken

Loony, as a mild asthma sufferer myself I really found myself warming to your article. I'd quite like to see the two article combined somehow.
Did the drop-down boxes method of making articles browser friendly drop out of fashion? Maybe that would be a way of dealing with an article of this length.


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Post 5

Lonnytunes - Winter Is Here

Metal Chicken, yes the drop-down boxes have been dropped. They are not mentioned in the current sub editors guidelines. These guidelines tell subs what code we can use.

I believe the original article tries to explain two much. This has the effect of inducing boredom and is a turn-off.

A couple of years ago I ended up in hospital with two collapsed lungs after an asthma attack. I am also blessed with emphyasema. Sob.


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