h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My ex-wife is a huge fan of The Monkees. She learned that Davey Jones was living back in England and was running a stud-farm. Knowing a little about horses herself she schooled me in a few horsey terms and had me phone his secretary. Within minutes the man himself came on the phone.
Rather than muck him about any further I informed him of our ruse and he chatted away to her for a minute or two, not in the least peeved.
Made her day.
He sounded exactly the same as he does in the series (not that that's surprising.

Very nice, and I apologise for not noticing this comment sooner!

Yes, they can be real nice blokes. I've had a chance to join three of them at an after concert party, and did some work for the fourth. I even served as Mr. Jones' head of security at a hotel event. He was there with the co-writer of his book, Alan Greene.

They have often proved to be very appreciative of their fan-base.

Davy Jones used to live in Farlington, near Portsmouth, or so said my driving instructor, who once pointed out his house to me, many years ago. No idea if he's still in the area, but I probably shouldn't be discussing this with his head of security

He needs security? Whatever for?

Are there Rabid Monkee fans in the area?

Er, I mean rabid fans of the monkees, not fans of rabid monkees.

Hi Fords - was the last posting the question I never answered?

I've no idea whether there are any Monkees fans in the area. If he needs security it'll be from the marauding groups of criminals from Leigh Park & Paulsgrove.