A Conversation for Sexual Frustration

Jewish Sexual Frustation and divorce

Post 1

Fraggle

AFAIK, in old Jewish law, if the wife is not satisfied sexually by her husband, first she should take him to the Rabbi. The Rabbi should then tell husband to get his act together and start giving her the happies.
If husband still can't/refuses to please her, she can then divorce him.

how true is this?


Jewish Sexual Frustation and divorce

Post 2

Anya

From a Jewish girl who has researched this:

sexual incompatibility is grounds for a woman to ask the rabbis to compel her husband to give her a divorce. HOWEVER, a woman under Jewish law CANNOT initiate a Jewish divorce. If she does not obtain a Jewish divorce and her husband refuses to give her one - then skips town - she is unable to remarry. If she does remarry the union is considered adulterous and any subsequent offspring are considered mamzerim (lit., b******s). The husband can remarry even if he does not obtain a divorce - polygamy is not forbidden in the Talmud. (Under Jewish law, extramarital sex is considered adultery only if the woman is married.)

However, in the Talmud, a man is commanded to give his wife sexual satisfaction - it is considered the right of a married Jewish woman, not merely a privilege, to have sexual fulfillment. He is even told the minimum number of times he is supposed to sleep with his wife, categorized by profession: sailors, once every six months, scholars, three times a week, and (my favorite) unemployed, every day!

Speaking for myself, as a liberal Jew - and ardent feminist - the laws about divorce are horribly unjust. However, Judaism is a wonderfully enlightened religion in that it celebrates the joy of human sexuality and rejects asceticism as incompatible with nature. That age-old celebration of eroticism, the Song of Songs, is proof that Judaism is a very sex-positive religion.


Jewish Sexual Frustation and divorce

Post 3

AgProv2

Can the word "mamzer" be used as we would use the English equivalent?

Ie, could I say of somebody who is being unreasonable or irritating or bloody-minded or - well, just a total bastard, in the other sense of the word - does "mamzer" carry the same charge?


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