A Conversation for The Dune Chronicles by Frank Herbert
just a few typos
Catachrest Started conversation Dec 23, 2005
Just a few typos that you might want to correct when you get a chance. Great article!
"... a hard an unforgiving..." >> a hard AND unforgiving
"When a society goes to war, a near messianic figure emerges to 'lead the troops to victory' such as Hitler or Mussolini appears." >> Just take off the word "appears".
" in Herbert's mind the possibility of it being attainable is just not possible," >> this sentence is just a bit awkward; maybe try something along the lines of: "in Herbert's mind, it is unattainable" or "in Herbert's mind, it is impossible to attain."
(in the section on the CHOAM) God Emperor Dune - Not sure, but I think it's God Emperor of Dune.
Footnote 7: "mans reliance on machines" >> "man's reliance on machines";
"Barons ancestor" >> "Baron's ancestor"
Footnote 8: Sentence fragments: maybe try making these into full sentences; they might flow better.
"...at making machines and especially miniaturisation of machines" >> "...at making machines and especially miniaturising machines"
"Often came very close to breaking the rules laid down after the Butlerian Jihad10" >> This is a sentence fragment - try adding "They" at the beginning to give your sentence a subject. Alternatively, you could put a comma after "miniaturizing machines" and change "came" to "coming" to join these sentences together.
There are a few more but I have to go! Again, very good, very thorough article. When I reread Dune and read for the first time some of the sequels, I want to have this article beside me.
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