A Conversation for How to Survive Family Parties

Embarrassing Questions

Post 1

HarpoNotMarx (((2*1)^6)-6-(2*8)=42

When the old Aunts ask "haven't you grown", you could always deadpan back at them with "I haven't noticed, I've been dooing too many other things" or if feeling cruel "Oh, your whiskers are softer than I remembered"

Embarrassing Questions

Post 2

Red (and a bit grey) Dog

You might want to consider "haven't you shrunk" as a suitable reply smiley - laugh

Embarrassing Questions

Post 3

Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry!

I remember one of my friends (who is well known for being acidic and sarcastic) who was asked by a distant aunt (who was harassing everyone with such questions) "So, when are you going to get married?"

My friend's response was "Dunno. When are you going to die?"

That stopped the conversation!

Embarrassing Questions

Post 4


* makes careful notes *

Cheers for that smiley - ok

Embarrassing Questions

Post 5

Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry!

No worries! I thought that was a class reply to that question...

I have very little extended family left in this country, so I'm lucky enough to escape all this.

Embarrassing Questions

Post 6

Red (and a bit grey) Dog

You could always practice your technique on your friends families so that when the need arises you're ready smiley - winkeye

Embarrassing Questions

Post 7

Barneys Bucksaws

My old Auntie May(Rest her Soul), asked repeatedly, not just at family parties, but every time she saw me since I was age 5 or so: My, Linda you're thin.

The answer I could never give her (my mom, or dad would have thumped me!) is "Certainly I'm thin. I take after my Dad, and Grandma, and, by the way, have you looked in a full-length mirror lately?" Tall and very thin run in the family. I had to be polite, simply smile, and walk away.

Embarrassing Questions

Post 8

Rains - Wondering where time's going and why it's in so much of a hurry!

This reminds me of what happened to my mum when she was younger at a family party. Up till she had me she was very thin, no matter how much she ate.

At one party one relative, who thought they were being oh so humourous, called her Olive Oyl (after the Popeye character). The label stuck for many years and she cursed him at every opportunity. but at the time she couldn't answer back as she was only a teenager and would have got shouted at.

It's awful when you can't answer back properly!

Embarrassing Questions

Post 9

Ace Rimmer [pretending]

Ahhh family parties...
Always ends a disaster at my place.

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