The proliferation of nonsense

Only this first bit isn't nonsense - please click here and feed someone for free at The hunger site


The only way to get one
is by trying very hard
and the only way to keep it
is to never be off guard

To prevent it ever fading
don't leave it in the sun
and only use it seriously
never just for fun

You must polish it on Sundays
taking care to make it shine
but don't bring it round to my house
it could get confused for mine

I'll deny I've ever had one
never have and never will
if you'd started searching years back
you'd be looking for it still

Not only is it hidden
and cleverly disguised
but I never ever bought one
cos they didn't do my size

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The sun comes up 'n the sun goes down,
The hands on the clock keep goin' around;
I just get up 'n it's time to lay down,
Life gets tee-jus don't it?

My shoes untied, but I don't care,
I ain't figuring on goin' nowhere;
I'd have to wash and comb my hair,
And that's just wasted effort.

The water in the well's gettin' lower and lower,
Can't take a bath for six months or more;
But I've heard it said and it's true I'm sure,
That too much bathin' will weaken yer.

I open the door and the flies swarm in,
Shut the door and I'm sweating again;
And in the process I cracked my shin,
Just one darn thing after another.

You know that old brown mule, he must be sick,
I jabbed him in the rump with a pin on a stick;
He humped his back but he wouldn't kick,
There's something cockeyed somewhere.

A mouse a-chawing at the pantry door,
He's been at it for a month or more;
When he gets through there, he's going to be sore,
There ain't a darn thing in there.

Hound dog howling so forlorn,
Laziest dog that ever was born;
He's howlin' 'cause he's sitting on a thorn,
Just too tired to move over.

Tin roof leaks and the chimney leans,
There's a hole in the seat of my old blue jeans;
I've ate the last of the pork and beans,
Just can't depend on nothin'.

The cows gone dry and hens won't lay,
Fish quit biting last Saturday;
Troubles pile up day by day,
Now I'm getting dandruff.

Grief and misery, pains and woes,
Debts 'n taxes 'n so it goes;
And I think I'm getting a cold in the nose,
Life gets tasteless don't it?

by Carson Robinson 1948


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Jim Pooley is back

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