A Conversation for The Stewarts. James I And VI, Comes To The English Throne

A87793960 - James Ist, The First Stuart King of England

Post 101

bobstafford

Sounds like a plan smiley - ok


A87793960 - James Ist, The First Stuart King of England

Post 102

bobstafford

All amended smiley - cheers


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 103

Bluebottle

Page Turner:
Entry: James 1st, The First Stuart King of England - A87793960
Author: bobstafford - U3151547

Sorry, the first sentence should start 'James VI' not 'James IV'.

I think that we need a short sentence in the 'Path to the Throne of England' section to link James VI to Margaret. We've had Henry Tudor marry Elizabeth of York and have a daughter, Margaret, who was James V's wife and mother to James V. We need a short sentence to state that James V was succeeded by Mary Queen of Scots and James VI was her son.

Another bit to look at:

'Mary's forces were defeated, and this led to his mother’s flight from Scotland when he was just over a year old. She landed in Workington in Cumbria and was taken to Carlisle Castle where she was held.' Do you mean 'Mary's forces were defeated, and this led to her flight from Scotland when her son, the young James, was just over a year old. She landed in Workington in Cumbria and was taken to Carlisle Castle where she was held.'

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A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 104

bobstafford

Thanks please check the edit and see if that covers your suggestionsmiley - smiley


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 105

Recumbentman

Why does Margaret have a separate paragraph within the bulleted list?


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 106

bobstafford

No real reason apart from being the one of the subjects of the entry smiley - cheers
Changed as suggested it looks better smiley - ok


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 107

Bluebottle

Did you want to change the sentence:
'Margaret, Queen of Scots, wife of King James IV and mother of King James V.'
to:
' Margaret, Queen of Scots, wife of King James IV, mother of King James V and grandmother of Mary, Queen of Scots'

The next section states that James VI was the son of Mary, Queen of Scots – but you've not explained who Mary, Queen of Scots was or her relationship to Henry VII and how that meant James was heir to the throne of England.

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A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 108

Bluebottle

I've read through and it is an enjoyable, historical entry.

Are you planning on finishing more Stuart ones?

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A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 109

bobstafford

I will defiantly held back as PR was slow now we have a blue bottle on the case they will arrive soon.smiley - biggrin


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 110

bobstafford

Please check the points raised in your last edit post have been dealt with please confirm all is ok smiley - smiley


A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 111

Bluebottle

Yep, the Margaret section is much better and very informative. smiley - smiley

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A87793960 - James 1st, The First Stuart King of England

Post 112

bobstafford

smiley - biggrin good just what I wanted, thanks for your good work smiley - ok


Congratulations - Your Entry has been Recommended for the Edited Guide!

Post 113

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Congratulations - Your Entry has been Recommended for the Edited Guide!

Post 114

Bluebottle

smiley - applauseCongratulations!
Just think – James VI may have come to the English throne, but he never got to h2g2's front pagesmiley - winkeye

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Congratulations - Your Entry has been Recommended for the Edited Guide!

Post 115

bobstafford

smiley - ok


Congratulations - Your Entry has been Recommended for the Edited Guide!

Post 116

Recumbentman

smiley - bubbly


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