h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: A Roman Legion - A87864871
Author: bobstafford - U3151547

Please comment and advise

Hiya,

There is a fair bit of cut and paste error here. I will leave you to spot it.

I had two serious thoughts:
1) The prefects were centurion NCOs who had field command. How did they fit in?
2) There are a lot of footnotes. Some of them could be included in the main text quite easily. I can go through and make some suggestions but only if you would like me to!



PS: There is no reference to the army shield (A87709675 Roman Shields) which is quite disappointing. I personally think everybody should reference the roman army sheild.

Phoenician Trader please feel free

I hope the edit has covered the points mentioned including the Praefectus Castrorum

I have added the link and sorted the text a little your opinion please

I'm not so sure about your opening lines. You assume that people know all about the Roman Empire before starting. Perhaps you could take a step backwards and roughly outline about the Roman Empire and the status of the Legions, without assuming that people have already a good idea about it.

With my husband having been a Latin teacher for over 40 years now, I have visited many places in the ex-Roman Empire and reckon I know quite a bit about it. You assume that "If asked to think about what you know about the Roman Empire, unsurprisingly one the first thing that would probably come to mind would be the Legions." The legions are not at the top of my list of features of Roman Life at all, but the political system, laws, culture, architecture, slave system etc. Of course, this is a subjective point of view, but it could apply even more to someone who is only just starting to get interested in that period of history.

I would also challenge the assumption that the Roman Legions are the "best known fighting force in history." Given the year we are in, at the moment, people will be more conscious of the Regiments of the First World War (maybe not the most effective fighting force, but, for the time being, possibly the best known, at least in the UK, Belgium and France.)

However, you go on to point out that the legions are responsible for conquering a huge part of the then known world, and THAT is interesting - and a very very important point in your entry, which should be emphasised, and perhaps be the content of the opening paragraph. And not until the end do you mention that it was the Roman Army who laid out the main transport routes and larger towns which shape Europe today. That again, is a huge point, which deserves a mention at the beginning of the entry, to remind readers why they should be interested in the subject.

My knowledge of the legions was mainly gained from a little learned in history at school, the very successful book "The Eagle of the Ninth" and several visits to the site of the Battle between Varus and the Romans. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Teutoburg_Forest

The entry gives a well-structured summary of the basics of the military organisation of the time, and includes everything you would expect for an entry on this topic - number of members, hierarchy, length of service, methods of recruitment, pay, uniform issue, living and fighting conditions.

I found the section on military strategies very interesting, and would have liked more on that, but then again, it is slightly off-topic, so I wouldn't recommend making it any longer, but perhaps some links...

Thank you commenting and for the points you have noticed TC and your helpful comments.
Point I
You assume that people know all about the Roman Empire before starting. Perhaps you could take a step backwards and roughly outline about the Roman Empire and the status of the Legions, without assuming that people have already a good idea about it.

Sounds like a good idea I will look at that but it will add to the entry.

Point II
The legions are not at the top of my list of features of Roman Life at all, but the political system, laws, culture, architecture, slave system etc. Of course, this is a subjective point of view, but it could apply even more to someone who is only just starting to get interested in that period of history.

How about an edit to:- If asked to think about what you know about the Roman Empire, amongst the list of things you would come to mind including, the political system, laws, culture, architecture and slavery. One the things that would come to mind would be the Legions.

Point III
I would also challenge the assumption that the Roman Legions are the "one of the best known fighting force in history." what about "one of the best known fighting force in ancient history."

Point IV
However, you go on to point out that the legions are responsible for conquering a huge part of the then known world, and THAT is interesting - and a very very important point in your entry, which should be emphasised, and perhaps be the content of the opening paragraph. And not until the end do you mention that it was the Roman Army who laid out the main transport routes and larger towns which shape Europe today. That again, is a huge point, which deserves a mention at the beginning of the entry, to remind readers why they should be interested in the subject.

I shall attend to this

Point V
My knowledge of the legions was mainly gained from a little learned in history at school, the very successful book "The Eagle of the Ninth" and several visits to the site of the Battle between Varus and the Romans. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Teutoburg_Forest; The Teutoburg Forest was due to a trechuous guide and Thank you commenting and for the points you have noticed TC and your helpful comments.
Point I
You assume that people know all about the Roman Empire before starting. Perhaps you could take a step backwards and roughly outline about the Roman Empire and the status of the Legions, without assuming that people have already a good idea about it.

Sounds like a good idea I will look at that but it will add to the entry.

Point II
The legions are not at the top of my list of features of Roman Life at all, but the political system, laws, culture, architecture, slave system etc. Of course, this is a subjective point of view, but it could apply even more to someone who is only just starting to get interested in that period of history.

How about an edit to:- If asked to think about what you know about the Roman Empire, amongst the list of things you would come to mind including, the political system, laws, culture, architecture and slavery. One the things that would come to mind would be the Legions.

Point III
I would also challenge the assumption that the Roman Legions are the "one of the best known fighting force in history." what about "one of the best known fighting force in ancient history."

Point IV
However, you go on to point out that the legions are responsible for conquering a huge part of the then known world, and THAT is interesting - and a very very important point in your entry, which should be emphasised, and perhaps be the content of the opening paragraph. And not until the end do you mention that it was the Roman Army who laid out the main transport routes and larger towns which shape Europe today. That again, is a huge point, which deserves a mention at the beginning of the entry, to remind readers why they should be interested in the subject.

I shall attend to this

Point V
My knowledge of the legions was mainly gained from a little learned in history at school, the very successful book "The Eagle of the Ninth" and several visits to the site of the Battle between Varus and the Romans. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Teutoburg_Forest;

The Teutoburg Forest disaster was due to a treacherous guide and Various allowing himself to be mislead. As for the 9th what are your thoughts on my observations here, A Roman Mystery - the Lost 9th Legion.

Point VI
I found the section on military strategies very interesting, and would have liked more on that, but then again, it is slightly off-topic, so I wouldn't recommend making it any longer, but perhaps some links...
Perhaps entries on the fate of Boudica and the slave revolt Spartacus? Or Caesars exploits in France.



The entry gives a well-structured summary of the basics of the military organisation of the time, and includes everything you would expect for an entry on this topic - number of members, hierarchy, length of service, methods of recruitment, pay, uniform issue, living and fighting conditions. Thank you just what I hoped for.
being misslead. What are your thoughts on my observations here, A Roman Mystery - the Lost 9th Legion.

Point VI
I found the section on military strategies very interesting, and would have liked more on that, but then again, it is slightly off-topic, so I wouldn't recommend making it any longer, but perhaps some links...
Perhaps entries on the fate of Boudica and the slave revolt Spartacus, Or Caesar's exploits in France.



The entry gives a well-structured summary of the basics of the military organisation of the time, and includes everything you would expect for an entry on this topic - number of members, hierarchy, length of service, methods of recruitment, pay, uniform issue, living and fighting conditions. Thank you just what I hoped for.

Thank you TC for all the excellent points raised I look forward to your further thoughts

Sorry about the doubling up

Hi bob.

Your Point I is fine, but you don't have to adopt my list entirely - I'm sure it's a purely subjective view, and, as I haven't lived in Britain for over 40 years now, and, as I said, being married to a Latin teacher all that time, I am possibly not your typical demographic here. If you say "one of the things..." is the Roman military system, that would be fine.

I see you have changed it a bit now and that is OK.

The way you have dealt with the other points is fine, too.

I remember reading your entry on the mystery of the lost 9th Legion, and have just had another look at it; it really is very interesting. In this new entry, it is linked to twice - I don't think that's the one you really meant on the subject of Roman ships....

Thank you for your comments at 5678 words I think that is about it as I can hear the calls to split the entry already.

I hope that you found it readable and hopefully interesting, and thank you for your assistance

Any more comments

Not from me.

TC

You have one major repetition;

'Map Links' near the opening and 'The Builders of Empire' near the the end cover that same information.

Personally I prefer it near the end after you have given us a reason to visit the links



F S

Good point thanks FS will do

Hi bob.

I agree entirely with TC's comments earlier. You need to introduce what a legion is right at the start, rather than telling us that we all must know what a legion is already.

You've responded to TC's comments in completely the wrong way, by adding a load of stuff about roads which only makes the entry less clear.

Start with a short paragraph saying what a legion was, then continue with your original entry, without all the stuff about roads.

And please, please, read what you have written to see whether it flows or not.

I have had a read through and made some alterations is that better

>>What Was A Roman Legion

>>If asked to list what you know about the Roman Empire, amongst the things that would come to mind would be the Legions. This is hardly surprising as the legions were possibly the most effective fighting force of the period and probably one of the best known fighting force in ancient history.

=======

Gnomon is right, stop telling us what you think we know about a Roman Legion and start by telling us what you know. Is a legion just a unit of fighting soldiers, or did they also have medical and construction legions? Why is a Roman legion different from any other fighting force of the time?

Make believe that the reader has never seen the word 'legion' before in their life. Even those who think they know what they were might be totally wrong in their beliefs.

Can you think of five or six bullet points about how to define a Roman legion? If so turn them into a paragraph and use that as your opening paragraph. If not start working on it, that needs to be your opening.

F S

FS I shall go through it with that in mind in the next few days