Our Man in Milliways - La Trappiste, Altrincham
Created | Updated Jun 16, 2010
Le Trappiste - Altrincham
And now, for something completely different.
Well, not completely different, but in this issue of OMIM, we won't be eating anything more interesting than small chunks of cheddar cheese on cocktail sticks, cheese and onion crisps, and maybe a bag of chips on the way home if we're lucky. In fact, a steaming hot bag of pommes frites would be quite apt, because your roving reporter is trying the best that Belgium has to offer at Le Trappiste – Altrincham's Belgian Beer Bar1.
Drink
Easing myself into things gently, I ordered up a bottle of Vedett – a blond lager weighing in at a pitiful 5.0%. As far as lagers go, Vedett is far superior to the bland and tasteless offerings served up by the folks at Carling, Fosters and Budweiser. While it's not the most intriguing beer on the menu, Vedett is crisp and refreshing, with a nice hoppy aftertaste.
Next up, I moved onto a more heavyweight offering – a bottle of the Saison ale Avec Les Bons Voeux2. Packing a hefty punch at 9.50%, the ALBV isn't really a beer you'd be able to drink all night, but its combination of bitter hops and subtly sweet spices mean that a glass or two in moderation can be enjoyed by those who think that high alcohol percentages aren't just reserved for Special Brew.
For my third bottle, I decided to experiment with a type of beer that I'd never tried before – a geuze. Frank Boon Geuze (6%) is a blend of young and three-year aged lambics that can't really be described. Tasters who enjoyed it described it as 'cidery', 'interestingly sour' and 'yeasty' – whilst the less adventurous claimed it was 'like beery lemons gone wrong'. Interestingly the men in the group adored this beer, whilst the ladies all turned their noses up at it. Definitely one to try though.
As the evening turned to night, inebriation began to kick in with a vengeance – not helped by a beer calling itself Delirium Tremens. That's right, a pale ale named after 'the shakes'. What's more, this 9% ABV monster comes in a glass decorated with dancing pink elephants. Admirably, the DT delivers this alcoholic punch with style – with a slightly sweet aftertaste that's much more pleasant than you might expect.
Next on the list was a particular favourite of mine – St Bernardus Wit. This extremely drinkable witbier is smooth, tasty and possesses a slightly peppery aftertaste. Unfortunately, I wasn't left with much time to savour this delightful brew as some sadist had purchased a round of shots which came served alongside sugar cubes, slotted spoons and small jugs of water. Those of you who have met the Green Fairy before won't need me to describe the taste or effects, while those who haven't should steer clear of such excesses. Needless to say, the next stop was the tram station.
Overall
I could write about the delightful wood panelled décor, the pictures of Tin Tin and the table service, but it's 17:13 the day after and I'm still nursing an absinthe-inspired headache. As such, I'll just tell you all that if you ever want to get roaringly drunk in a relaxed, continental-style bar/café with table service – head down to Le Trappiste. Just steer well clear of anything green.
Pricewise, 14 of us racked up a £300 tab, which the mathematically inclined amongst you will work out is round about £20 each. Not bad at all for a night out, especially given the quality of the drink on offer. Admittedly, the food is limited to cheese, crisps and a 'Belgian Bar Platter' which inexplicably contains hummus, so given that this is a foodies column I'll have to mark it down. 8/10
Scale: 10 – Belgian Beer, 9/8 – German Beer, 7/6 – Czech Beer, 5/4 – English Beer, 3/2 – Australian Beer, 1 – American BeerThis column is open to contributions from all members of the h2g2 community. All submissions are accepted on the basis that they are honest and unbiased, and all opinions expressed are those of the reviewers, who may not be professional restaurant critics. Send your reviews to the usual submissions address.
