Hello from me
Welcome to my space! I've been talking about and I spend a lot of time hanging around ask h2g2. The Post is a good read, and so is whatever you get when you click here. Probably . You might like to drop by our book club for a chat, or browse through what we've all been reading.
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Take a look at my shiny badge, I am one of a select club:
I have noticed occasional gripes that people sometimes don't say enough about themselves here so to give you a more rounded picture of myself I will write a randomly edited story of my life so far.
I am a girl - probably a woman but am unsure where the distinction is drawn. I am in my (gaaaah!) early th*rties but still feel about 18, not sure what I will do when I grow up. I studied Neuroscience at uni but somehow deviated into IT after dropping out of the dullest PhD in the history of science.
I was made redundant from my IT Consultant job for christmas 2001 and then embarked on a venture with my own consultancy business (number of staff = 1) and do contract IT work. The market grew awfully quiet for a while and so at christmas 2002 I took another dramatic change of direction and began teaching.
I taught adults how to implement the technology I have been working with for the past few years. I liked teaching, getting paid to talk was fab and as I was teaching paying adults I avoided many of the problems teachers of teenagers encounter. The big problem was that I travelled a *lot* for that job, when I'd much rather have been at home. When my other half decided to propose he organised a romantic weekend away which was scuppered by the travelling I did for work -it was then I decided to change again. So here I am, a software developer, still working on the same system I learned in 1998. I'm bored, but the money is good. I don't have to travel and the first bit of stability in my career has meant I could invite Patsy and Edina into my life - they are two beautiful crossbreed Jack Russell terriers. I love them deeply and don't know how I managed so long without them!
I live with my husband we got married on 6th August 2005 and it was an amazing, wonderderful day. I have something of a social conscience and my husband says I am a wishy-washy liberal. This is mainly because I don't always agree with him when we discuss the world and he sometimes is forced to resort to name-calling, and although he is generally conservative (small 'c') we get on surprisingly well.
I love cooking, eating, wine, and consumption generally. My generosity of curves reflects these passions and I am usually in the throes of a major diet. I refuse to give up my cup of in the mornings though - I have an obsession with all things coffee related that I just can't shake. The current diet seems to be going well and I can be found in the gym most evenings, scaring everyone with my crimson, sweaty face. The purchase of a good sports bra has significantly reduced the risk of injury both to myself and to by-standers . You can read about my diet, what started it, and how it was going up until christmas 2002 here. Things were a tad slower in 2003/4 but I am hanging on in there, although I am really cross that despite trying for three and a half years I am STILL NOT THIN With the thought of my wedding dress to spur me on I shrank to a reasonable size, but comfort and security has resulted in an expanded waistline again. I'm back into my gym routine now so may one day achieve thinness again, possibly even in this lifetime.
About seven years ago I bought and decorated a flat and my proudest achievement (in true interview stylee) was tiling the bathroom and not making a complete hash of it. The husband and I now live in a real house (with an upstairs and an outdoors and everything) that needs tons of work so we will be busily DIYing every weekend for ever more. I'm learning lots about gardening and our first spring in our new home was wonderful - lots of life bursting out all over the place as the bulbs come up and the plants come back to life. I collect shiny things for my house with only barely more taste than a magpie.
I've just checked, and I've been hootooing since 20th July 2001. Gosh.
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Welcome to this Researcher's Journal. If you'd like to comment on anything they have written here, just click the relevant 'Discuss this Entry' button.Work are making 200 staff redundant... (Jul 12, 2012)
...as they are outsourcing to India.
Sadly, I'm not one of them.
At this rate there will be five of us, all desperate to leave but all with families and unwilling to just go without the redundancy package, sitting alone in that massive great building surrounded by the empty desks of former colleagues who *didn't* want to leave, being asked to do the jobs of the 50-strong team we used to have.
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(7 replies, Latest reply: Jul 13, 2012)
I do count my blessings, honestly... (Apr 10, 2012)
I *know* I am very, very lucky to have the two beautiful sons that I do have. I also know that this is going to sound self-indulgent to those of my friends who, despite trying and desperately wanting one have been unable to have any children, so I apologise to them. Don't think for a second that I don't know how lucky I am, and don't think I am not grateful for my lot.
Having said all that, I am beginning to get obsessive about the prospect (or lack of one) of having baby #3. I can't help but feel like there is a place for another child in our family and the drive to have one creates a kind of internal clamouring that can be hard to ignore. I stare at bumps, and newborns, and look into prams. I fight the urge (because I remember how weird it is when people do it) to touch the bumps of my pregnant friends.
I count my blessings but the two biggest ones serve to underline what my body seems to be telling me I need and haven't got. I know what I am missing, the good and the bad. My head can come up with dozens of reasons why not, why it wouldn't work, why it isn't the right time...none of which make any difference to how I feel about it.
Maybe if there were some physical barrier then I would accept that we are as complete a family as we will ever be, but the barrier is simply that J doesn't want any more children. He says no and I am not the kind of woman to have a deliberate 'accident', so I carefully and dutifully do the things that go against what I *really* want.
I am sure this constant nagging ache is nothing compared to the pain of the feelings of those who want them but cannot have children at all, but it is real and painful nonetheless.
I have no idea how to resolve this. Seems unlikely J will change his mind - I think in a way the little bit of hope is what is slowly driving me batty. Perhaps I should send him for the snip so at least it is a final decision.
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(17 replies, Latest reply: Jul 14, 2012)
Elenor Rigby (Mar 8, 2012)
Heard yesterday that my Great Aunt died, the bonkers one that dragged my dad to New York on several occasions to help her, then pretended she didn't know why he ws there when he turned up, and who insulted him by suggesting he was helping to get his hands on her money rather than because she was family who needed help. He fell out of contact with her after that, about 5 years ago. She thought the CIA was watching her, but apparently she died several weeks ago and laid undiscovered and alone. A sad end to a life, but she made it very difficult for anyone to be involved with her so not really surprising.
She really wasn't a very nice woman - for years she teased my Dad with the promise of information about his father that she never passed on to him. She threatened constantly to write him out of her will, which he couldn't give a stuff about - it really hurt him when she implied that he had only come to NY the last time to make a play for her money. She had been taken to hospital because her flat had turned into one of those nightmares you see on the telly heaped with rubbish and couldn't take care of herself and he jumped through all sorts of hoops in court to get her released from hospital into his care, took her to Ireland (where she said she would stay but she ran back to NY the second he left her) where there are other members of the family (who would have nothing to do with helping her in NY) all of which he did because she was his mother's sister and he felt a family duty. Nothing to do with money.
A very sad way to end up, I don't know who found her in the end but expect it was the building manager who was the one that had her taken to hospital before. She should have been in a care home or sheltered housing really but she liked living in the rent controlled flat in New York, and couldn't be persuaded out of it.
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(4 replies, Latest reply: Mar 11, 2012)
So far, 2012, (Jan 31, 2012)
you have brought our family:
v)unbearable work stress
vi)18 hour days, 5-6 days a week for J
vii)a deeply upset friend
I'm not liking the look of the rest of the year if the first month has all that in it.
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(5 replies, Latest reply: Feb 1, 2012)
Just how many... (Jan 23, 2012)
...otherwise enjoyable threads really need to be about Peckham?
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(3 replies, Latest reply: Jan 23, 2012)
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These are all the Guide Entries this Researcher has created. If you'd like to read them, click on the link, and if you want to talk about them, use the 'Discuss this Entry' button when you get there.From h2g2: A87762513 Favourite Children's Authors (Jun 18, 2012)
From h2g2: A87749914 Favourite Children's Books (Mar 26, 2012)
From h2g2: A59560383 Tips For Cold Mornings (Nov 13, 2009)
From h2g2: A20463860 Water Birth - a splashing way to enter the world (Mar 5, 2007)
From h2g2: A12004011 The Radish (May 24, 2006)
From h2g2: A10180081 (Mar 17, 2006)
From h2g2: A10111005 How Bona to Vada Your Eek! The Secret Language of Polari (Mar 14, 2006)
From h2g2: A9941150 I vow to thee my country and Jupiter (Mar 7, 2006)
From h2g2: A9935300 The 'V' Sign (Mar 7, 2006)
From h2g2: A8974047 The Women's Institue - All Jam and Jerusalem? (Jan 30, 2006)
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Favourite Children's Authors (Sep 13, 2012)
From h2g2: A9913908 The History of the Transit of Venus (Jun 15, 2012)
From h2g2: A60766518 Tips For Cold Mornings (Jan 4, 2010)
From h2g2: A12590327 Coca-Cola - a Soft Drink with Other Uses (Jul 27, 2006)
From h2g2: A12461465 The Radish (Jun 28, 2006)
From h2g2: A11047132 The V-Sign (May 12, 2006)
From h2g2: A10357832 Polari - the Secret Language (May 10, 2006)
From h2g2: A9115292 Cookham, Berkshire, UK (Mar 21, 2006)
From h2g2: A9115139 Swan Upping on the Thames (Mar 2, 2006)
From h2g2: A6951602 Bad Hair Day (Dec 15, 2005)
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