| This is the Conversation Forum for Martina Navratilova - Tennis Player Excellent and informative entry >>
Entry: UPDATE: Martina Navratilova - A66337176 Author: Galaxy Babe - U128652 Update on A594434, includes 2 new sections "In the Jungle" and "Greatest Battle" but the rest of Ormondroyd's excellent entry is unaltered.   GB  
Can't fault any of it - neither the old nor the new. A moving tale.
Hi GB. Good work.  Could you perhaps tell us in brackets the characters that Joe Swash and George Takei played? Put a comma after 'in January 2010'. Change the comma after 'it was still in the early stages' to a semicolon. it could be treated with radiation therapy following a lumpectomy. Following her treatment... Could you rephrase this to avoid the word 'following' twice in succession. Perhaps change the second one to "After her treatment". procrastinating and putting it off for a more conventient time -- You've said the same thing twice here. Leave out the word 'procrastinating'. Preventitive --> Preventative Please put a <BR/> tag after the </I> in the block quote at the end. ----------------------------------------------------- Changes needed in the original section: The link to Chris Evert is broken. 
Still remember one of the nespaper captions when Marina won her first 'Wimbledon' - it was 'Sweet Martina'  .Wondder if it might be worth emphasing that, against her own advice' she had delayed her mammogram for 4 years due to a combination of work commitments/lifestyle and her 'knowledge' of her own healthy lifestyle, including nutrition. i.e. A belief that it couldn't/wouldn't happen to someone like her 
Great feedback thank you <<Could you perhaps tell us in brackets the characters that Joe Swash and George Takei played?>> this is a reality TV programme, they were playing themselves All the typos attended to  <<Changes needed in the original section: The link to Chris Evert is broken.>>  I knew there was something else I meant to do!Links checked The broken link to Chris Evert has been removed and replaced << Wondder if it might be worth emphasing that, against her own advice' she had delayed her mammogram for 4 years due to a combination of work commitments/lifestyle and her 'knowledge' of her own healthy lifestyle, including nutrition. i.e. A belief that it couldn't/wouldn't happen to someone like her >>  BigAl
 I realise you meant played in EastEnders and Star Trek, so I've added them now
<Wondder if it might be worth emphasing that, against her own advice...>. That bit's reading very well now, GB. 
BigAl
If no-one else has any more comments I'll apply this now
Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'UPDATE: Martina Navratilova' to 'Martina Navratilova - Tennis Player'.
Game, set and match to the Babe! <bjorg>
Noodles and racket strings!  
 back atcha lil!
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