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| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 4, 2011 by KB | | Post: 1
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Reading about the Crusades, I got to thinking that there's too much trouble caused by everyone obsessing over the same holy places. Surely this can only be avoided if we have a) a bit of originality of thought and b) enough holy sites to go around.
So in the interests of do-goodery and world peace, I'm founding a new religion to do my bit.
After a lot of time and thought, I've decided our spiritual homeland shall be the town of Larne, in County Antrim. There are a number of reasons for this:
1) Nobody else has claimed it yet.
2) The only reason anyone goes there is to score some heroin or to get the ferry out of there ASAP. It surely deserves something else to boast of!
3) Perhaps most importantly for the peacekeeping project: If anyone else decides to claim Larne, The First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne wouldn't fight any wars or crusades. Oh no. The joy of choosing Larne as the spiritual centre of our universe is that if someone else claims it, we can cheerfully say "Stuff it, if you want it, it's yours!"
4) All good religions ought to have some concept of sacrifice in there somewhere. A pilgrimage to Larne ought to be enough sacrifice to cleanse the sins from the blackest of souls!
Now, where do I find out about getting charitable status and tax exemption?
Show us some foties of Larne. Please.
I want to hang them up instead of a Sacred Heart. Maybe next to my statue of Shiva...
Larne truly is spectacular, Dmitri - Lonely Planet voted it the town least worth visiting in all of Europe...
 Then we need to get on this initiative, right away.
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 4, 2011 by KB
This is a reply to this Posting
| | Post: 5
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Indeed...and there's so little else to say about it that Mala has to use that fact on every bus tour that passes Larne. 
Ok, foties: http://www.geograph.ie/photo/151905 View all the lovely shuttered up shops!
http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/F...arne_-_geograph.org.uk_-_148994.jpg There are the Churches first three cathedrals...
I'm sure you can get funding from the tourist board, KB, so they can do away with that embarrassing spot on the map that just says "here be...Larne".
See? That one shop says 'Blessings'. Proves it's holy.
But those blocks of flats look like the outskirts of Gheorgheni under Ceausescu. 
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 4, 2011 by KB
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| | Post: 8
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I never noticed it before, but what's with the picture of the plane on the high-rise in the first picture? It's giving off a very September 11th vibe...
Pictures of Larne???? NOOOOOOOOOO! 
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 5, 2011 by KB
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| | Post: 10
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 There, there Bea, it's ok...
If you close your left eye, screw your right one up a bit and gulp down a mugful of that Cragganmore whisky, it doesn't look just so bad you know!
I think I know what a pilgrimage to Larne should involve...
So who's up for the spring 2012 Larne hootoo meet? 
in the second piccy, the wiki one, why is the word 'POUND' written on the road with a turn left arrow?
Is this where they keep the only pound coin?
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 5, 2011 by KB
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| | Post: 14
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I think that's meant to say "Roundabout", perhaps...but the local junkies snorted most of the white powder of the letters away.
Awww man, I feel bad, now. Why do I feel bad for slagging Larne? 
If a HooToo Meet were held there, it might be good for the local economy...
Does it have pubs? and beer? and kebab shops? then we shall have a meet there 
We're planning a meet in Belfast in the summer, we could take a field trip to Larne...
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 5, 2011 by KB
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| | Post: 18
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There's still a bit of a trip to plan before I think of a Belfast meet in summer.
| Prev | Next | Subject: First Adventarian Lateral-Lutheran Church of Larne
Posted Dec 5, 2011 by KB
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| | Post: 19
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...But I think I'd skip the Larne part of the meet.
We are? How come I was not informed!
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