Posted Sep 10, 2009 by Baron Grim
I've been on this site for a decade. Nearly a quarter of my life. Longer than I've done any single thing in my life. For most of my time here I've felt like an outsider. Only in the last two or three years have I felt ownership of this place. And that feeling came after I felt I was becoming "unstuck" (F105207?thread=3566641) from this place.
I had just started a new job. My first "real" job.
I'd never ridden a motorcycle.
I was alone...
I'm still alone...
Back then I just thought about it more often.
Back then I thought it was wrong to be alone.
Now I can't remember the last time I thought it was wrong.
Congratulations on your tenth year.
It is very odd because I first met you through that posting on nasa; and I honestly thought that yolu were a new young h2g2 afficionada!!.
It has been such fun getting to know you, and your are so much part of the "informed, specialist h2g2 researchers" that you are a tremendous gift to us all.
Have a good day, and if you celebrate with have one on me.
Thursday 10th september 2009 8.20 BST
Dang, you're old, CZ. 10 years here and nearly 40, to boot. Congratulations on both.
As to not minding being alone, I manage it quite well. Welcome it, actually. But in my case the most amazing, unexpected thing has happened. Don't know whether to post this here or over at Gosho's. Well, here goes.
At 60 I find myself in what amounts to me as a nearly perfect domestic situation. It's far superior to being married. I have a gentleman friend who is so much like myself that it's scary. We enjoy the same movies, music, sports, etc. We share the same basic philosophy and have similar interests -- like Byzantine architecture. How bizarre is that! There's always someting to talk about. We've been seeing each other for long enough now that we're perfectly comfortable together. I genuinely enjoy him.
The great part is that he understands that I need my space. I have my place and he has his. He's here and I'm there, but the bottom line is that I can be alone when I want to be or need to be. I have company and support when I need it, an escort for "events", someone to just hang out with. Then he goes home and washes his own socks. It's fabulous.
So, at 60, I can truthfully say that I'm more content than I've ever been in my entire life. Don't get me wrong. I loved my husband and certainly didn't want him to die. But I really like my life now. Who'd a thunk it!
(Actually, I'm 42. I really need to get my "42" tattoo soon. Definitely need to before I'm not 42 anymore.)
Cheers to you, Hypatia, for finding that ever-elusive thing, contentment.
You're in a situation I could definitely enjoy, Hyp. I had a girlfriend about 15 years ago who was very protective of her time and space. We only saw each other from Wednesday to Sunday (which suited me quite well since I worked nights from Sunday to Tuesday) and she wasn't comfortable about me staying over more than once or twice a week. I couldn't understand it at the the time but now I do. If I was to meet someone right now, I don't think there's be any moving in together.
Of course, the whole green card thing puts a spanner in the works...
Did you marry BV to get into the country, Gosho? And will you apply for a permanent residence visa or another work visa? I've never been sure how all that works.
No, we married for all the right reasons
My residency (green card) lasts for ten years and is renewable. I could apply for citizenship.
My local bartender is in a similar situation and attitude. He's married to a local but refuses to apply for citizenship. He's a Brit and always will be. He has to return to Jolly Old every few years to keep his status and that is fine with him. He loves living on Galveston bay and never wants to leave but he'll keep renewing his "green" (pink) card as long as he stays here.
I am no longer married to a local, and I have no idea whether or not I will be in 204. I don't know if that will affect my application for renewal. I'd go for a US passport if I didn't have to renounce my UK nationality - dual citizenship.
The dual citizenship sounds appealing to me. But then I'm not the one doing it.
I think it is very difficult to get a dual citizenship passport in the U.S.
I believe you can do it now, and it changed very recently. It's not a dual passport though, you have two of them, one for each country.
And if you were trolling through the jungles of South America or the plains of Africa and you were captured by bandits, which do you reckon would be the two passports most likely to guarantee you an unpleasant and painful demise?
Yep. American and British.
I did know one fellow who had two U.S. passports. His business was selling large Earth moving equipment and he worked in the middle East quite often. He used one passport when traveling to Israel and the other when he went to Arab countries. The Arabs wouldn't do business with him if they knew he did business with Jews.
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