Too late for me, but...
Oct 26, 2007
If it prevents even one person having to go through what I (and my husband) have, then it will have been worthwhile.
Overheard at work...
Apr 26, 2007
Colleagues #1 and #2 are discussing a friend of colleague #1 who won a sum on the Grand National by betting on the winner.
Colleague #1: 'He says he picked that horse because Silver Birch is the name of his spirit guide'
Upon hearing that, Colleague #2 is silent for a few minutes, with an expression of intense concentration.
Colleague #2: 'So, you're saying his spirit guide's a racehorse?'
Cue SLG having to exit lab in rather a hurry to disguise the fact that I'm .
Jan 17, 2007
Pointing and laughing, more like
Have *you* seen my motivation? Reward offered.
Jan 20, 2006
Boredom sets in. I *could* go and sterilise the freezing covers. They need doing. But I can't be arsed. I will do it. Just not now. I *could* go and get some lunch. But apparently being mildly hungry isn't enough to motivate me to move. Apathy. Gotta love it.
Dec 2, 2005
There's this bird called Mary, yeah? She's a virgin (wossat then?)
She's not married or nuffink, but she's got this boyfriend, Joe, innit? He
does joinery an' that. Mary lives with him in a crib dahn Nazaref.
One day Mary meets this bloke Gabriel. She's like `Oo ya lookin at?'
Gabriel just goes 'You got one up the duff, you have.' Mary's totally
gobsmacked. She gives it to him large 'Stop dissin' me yeah? I ain't no
Kappa-slapper. I never bin wiv no one!'
So Mary goes and sees her cousin Liz, who's six months gone herself.
Liz is largin' it. She's filled with spirits, Barcardi Breezers an'
She's like 'Orright, Mary, I can feel me bay-bee in me tummy and I
reckon I'm well blessed. Think of all the extra benefits an' that we
are gonna get.' Mary goes 'Yeah, s'pose you're right'
Mary an' Joe ain't got no money so they have to ponse a donkey, an' go
dahn Bethlehem on that. They get to this pub an' Mary wants to stop,
yeah? To have her bay-bee an' that.
But there ain't no room at the inn, innit? So Mary an' Joe break an' enter into
this garridge, only it's filled wiv animals. Cahs an' sheep an' that.
Then these three geezers turn up, looking proper bling, wiv crowns on
their heads. They're like `Respect, bay-bee Jesus', an' say they're
wise men from the East End.
Joe goes: 'If you're so wise, wotchoo doin' wiv this Frankenstein an'
myrrh? Why dincha just bring gold, Adidas and Burberry?' It's all about
to kick off when Gabriel turns up again an' sez he's got another message
from this Lord geezer.
He's like 'The police is comin an' they're killin all the bay-bees. You better
nash off to Egypt.' Joe goes 'You must be monged if you think I'm goin' dahn
Egypt on a minging donkey'
Gabriel sez 'Suit yerself, pal. But it's your look out if you stay.' So
they go dahn Egypt till they've stopped killin the first-born an' it's
safe an' that.
Then Joe and Mary and Jesus go back to Nazaref, an' Jesus turns water into
I'd if it wasn't so close to home (well, close-ish. Romford's two stops away )
How many Scientists does it take to...
Oct 11, 2005
....notice a plug is out of it's socket?
A quick straw poll reveals that between the four of us in my lab, we have: 1 Medical Degree, 1 Doctorate, 2 Master's Degrees and 3 Bachelors Degrees. Not underqualified by any means, you'd have to agree.
So why on *earth* didn't we realise that the power had gone to the laser because the plug wasn't in the socket until *after* I'd rung the engineer to come and fix it?
Be afraid, be *very* afraid...
Sometimes you can't make it on your own
Sep 22, 2005
Do me a favour. Give your loved ones one a damn big hug and tell them how much you love them. I'm going to.
RIP SG. We tried our best.
Mar 14, 2005
And it was all going so well, as well .
I was finally over the grotty chest infection that kept me off work for a week and then I have to go and lose an argument with some frozen yorkshire puddings and a kitchen knife .
Still, I learnt how nice the staff in A&E where I work can be when they don't want you to do something for them, like, yesterday
Upshot is I have a very impressive cartoon style bandage round my hand, and got given the instruction not to get my hand wet for a week. Ewww.. . Going to make showering interesting, to say the least .
And I didn't even get a sticker saying I was a brave girl or nuffink . They probably wouldn't have given me one anyway, as I started backing out the cubicle when they couldn't promise me I wouldn't have stitches (I don't just those strip things to keep the inside of my hand where it should be). For a girl that has five tattoos and four piercings, I can be remarkably wussy about needles.
Ah well, hopefully that was the third thing.
Inexplicable phenomena #141 (or Gas stove 1, SLG 0)
Feb 21, 2005
When I moved in here, I had what seemed a thousand lighters. You couldn't move round here for 'em. Now I cant find *one* of the little ers. . WHY???
I can only surmise that they've all left home to join with the biros.
Important lesson learnt as result of this is to take more care when lighting ciggie from gas stove.. They'll grow back eventually, I'm sure .
Still, ER tonight, a nice glass of and a to play with.
It's not all bad
Jan 25, 2005
For ferk's sake, I just want to go and see the band, not buy shares in them
Oh, and thank you well-known-online-ticket-sales-agent for being *so* helpful. Not.
Ah well. You can't take it with you...
Sod's law and its' application in the NHS
Dec 14, 2004
Unwritten rules of night shifts..
1. *Never* attempt to go to the toilet whilst carrying a pager. It will always send out a trauma call, resulting in much hopping about and swearing.
2. All analysers are fitted with a critical need sensor, causing them to f**k up at *exactly* the point at which you really didn't want them to, causing much the same reaction as in rule 1.
3. s are *always* right. Even when they're so incredibly wrong you can't believe how they ever got qualified. Shouting louder at me and slamming down the phone will of course only prove to their rightness.
4. In addition to a pager I also carry a crystal ball, enabling me to see in to the future and anticipate crossmatch requests in advance. So of *course* your blood is going to be ready, even though you haven't actually got round to asking me to do it (refer to rule 3.)
And the burning question is.....
Dec 8, 2004
What's that strange noise coming from upstairs?
Answers on a postcard to the usual address.
A fluffy sweet and a used tube ticket what I found in my pocket just now to the winner (form an orderly queue please)...
Oct 28, 2004
Well, it's been a while
Movin' just keep movin'
Something's happened today that I'm very happy about. Those that care will already know. The rest...
I'd like to thank...
May 28, 2004
...the Doctors at my place of work for proving to me (yet again) that the ability to pass a five-year medical degree is *no* indication of intelligence. It can only get worse as the newly qualified ones haven't even started yet . I think I'm going into hiding until at least September.
...London Transport, without whom I might actually get somewhere on time.
...the makers of a certain brand of energy drink that gives you wings for giving me the ability to walk and talk simultaneously.
...that nasty little virus I've picked up that's making me feel so . I honestly never knew one person could produce so much snot. I refuse to let you win, you little b***ers
...my own personal God who, despite all the above is managing to make me feel that life is kind of at the moment.
On the Stressed List
May 14, 2004
It's days like this I have to remind myself that I volunteered - nay, wanted - to do this. Nobody made me.
I'm not coping very well with trying to juggle a full time job, part time degree, night work *and* maintain some semblance of a social life. Something's got to go. And I think it's going to be my sanity.
I'm having to force myself to revise, when all I want to do these days is sleep. If i revise when I'm tired then nothing sinks in. Which makes me even more stressed.
When this is all over, if I ever mention the word 'study' *ever* again you all have my express permision to a) remind me of this journal entry and b) take me outside and shoot me.
Sod it. I'm off to find some
May 7, 2004
Where to start?
Life is goooood...
Apr 27, 2004
Seems I can't even get on a train these days without people taking offence . Beats me why though , cos until they decide to lay on a special train just for me so's I don't have to share space with people who'd obviously rather I not be there, that's the way it has to be, so they're just gonna have to grow up and get over it
Apr 12, 2004
I knew drinking all that was a bad idea.
People shouldn't make assumptions...
Feb 16, 2004
..about me. Because if they would only ask me instead of assuming I might just turn round and suprise the hell outta them.
By sharing these assumptions with other people they become in a way a truth by which you are forever judged
How do you begin to explain that the person you are thought to be isn't the way you *really* are? especially when you've never been asked who the *real* you is...It frustrates me, yet I haven't got a clue about how to go about correcting people's misconceptions.
All I know is I'm not like they think I am. The rest I just make up as I go along and hope for the best
Feb 5, 2004
Things I hate about being
1) needing TLC and having nobody around to give it to me. Where's a male when you need one?!
2) resulting sense of humour failure which makes me take things *way* more seriously than I should do and be with people who don't deserve it.
3) tissues. Lots and Lots of tissues.
On the other hand, it is an opportunity to wrap myself up with a warm duvet and copious amounts of and watch trash tv.
Random stuff that makes me realise life's not so bad after all....
Jan 8, 2004
Well I know nobody's going to read this, but gonna record it for posterity anyway. Not often this happy so would hate for moment to go unrecognised.
Just got permanent internet access for the first time and got my eyebrow pierced again.
The strange little things that make us happy, eh?
Plus got family pack of maltesers on standby. Mmmm.... Chocolate
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