Absent - but a believer
Nov 26, 2011
How come I am not a fervent contributor to H2G2, though I think and have experienced this is the best place to read and to meet intelligent, generous and humorous individuals?
How come it is easier to check Facebook a couple of times a day?
Facebook doesn't satisfy my thirst for knowledge about people, how you think and feel. What you actually mean ...
On the other hand H2G2 craves a lot of time - at least for us to whom English is a second language - and, to whom, like me, want to be as clever and clear about our real and deep down opinions about whatever we chose to engage in.
I have been an absent fan and contributor for about a year, and I cannot see a way to be more active - though I miss you all a lot.
Maybe I'm just too old to be an asset? Maybe because of my ity I can pick and choose...
I hope so.......
Where did it go?
Feb 19, 2011
For the last hour I've been writing a very important (to me) journal. Writing, checking, previewing etc.
And now it is gone. Da**. I'm not sure I have the energy or the gist to rewrite it.
So. Where did it go?
Shit Happens! Life is Good!
Feb 19, 2011
Today we said goodbye to a very good friend.
"Shit happens!" was his comment when he was diagnosed with incurable cancer.
And then he continued to live after his credo, which he always put at the end of all postcards, letters, mails, sms's and discussions: "Life is good!".
The funeral service was at our local (protestant) church although he was not a member of the church and leaned towards more optimistic and/or fatalistic beliefs: "Life is good!" - "Shit happens!"
Sig. S. rang the organist who was on holiday and asked him to go to work and play 'A Whiter Shade of Pale' in the beginning of the sermon (his choice) and "My Way" at the end, when the coffin was carried out (the wife's choice), which he did. He was also a friend and political companion (socialist).
Indeed our friend F. always did things his way, being careful not to hurt others in the process.
The speeches were very warm and painted a nuanced portrait of our friend. Sig. S. and I sang and played "Always on My Mind" (Willie Nelson) - the wife's request.
Sig. S. is always very emotional at funerals, but luckily he had practiced every day for a week with and without me, so we got through the very beautiful version he had created without breaking down. But at the end we both trembled so much that the vibrato became exaggerated .
Afterward, everyone was invited to the friend's and his wife's home for , Belgian beer and - our friend was from Belgium and his family had brought the goods to Denmark - wine, food, laughs and a lot of memories were consumed and exchanged - quite in our friend F.'s spirit.
He even made the sun shine during the day and the moon look like an orange pumpkin with half and half .
He loved traveling, company from all cultures and of all walks of life, cooking food, drinking wine and beer and talking for hours with good friends.
He will always be on my mind. And my resolution is to enjoy life even more and discard all the petty troubles.
Shit happens! - but - Life is Good!
Let us cherish our friendships.
Invited to Paris
Feb 13, 2011
Yesterday my daughter, son-in-law and my grandchild invited me on a trip to Paris.
They got married in August - the three of them . The initial of my grandson A., 8 years, is in both their wedding rings.
The very short honeymoon with A. went to Barcelona where they between visits to museums and other cultural sites watched Mesi score hat trick.
Some of their wedding presents were vouchers for a trip to Paris, and now they invited me - the mother-in-law - on a kind of honeymoon. I'll probably do some child sitting while they have a romantic night out. . Playing games I'm sure.
A. lives 7 days with my daughter and 7 days with his dad. And my daughter has a hard time missing him. Also because she misses out on one of her days as she teaches at a university in the other end of the country two days a week.
A. functions very well in all aspects. The parents have been very sensible and have taken care of A.'s emotions and well-being all the way through, and they share the responsibilities admirably. Even to the point that they have celebrated x-mas together with A. and nobody else since they split up more than three years ago.
Next month, the dad has some work to do in Vietnam and A. is with my daughter for three weeks in a row. That is why she and her husband takes time off and go on a holiday to be with A. as much as possible.
And now I'm invited as well.
I really enjoy being with S., Z. and A. So I'm looking forward to it.
I just have a twinge of bad conscience that I have to leave Sig. S. behind. I have done a lot of traveling during the recent years because of my union work. Seeing places, meeting people - and we haven't traveled very much together.
Anyway. Paris here I come! I haven't been to Paris since my early twenties.
Going to Australia
Jul 29, 2009
I'm still dizzy and not quite sure of what I'm doing.
But today I purchased a ticket for Australia, as if I was just going to do some journalistic work in, say, Sweden. (Just a hop over the bridge from Copenhagen).
I'm co-writing a book with a pedagogue who has used 'Music as a tool' - building on 'learning by doing' - with musicians, mentally handicapped, and the resulting rock band is going on tour and to a festival in Australia. http://awakeningsfestival.com.au/.
Half seriously, half as a joke I asked the pedagogue, who is also the manager of the band, whether they needed a journalist on the tour. And he said 'sure, why not. But we cannot pay your ticket or anything'.
But I found out it wasn't too expensive, and if I can sell 2-3 articles in Denmark or Scandinavia it'll pay for the experience.
The arranging people in Australia will fix me with (cheap-ish) food and boarding - and contacts I expect.
I'll have some very good material for the book, I'll get to see (a, granted, tiny bit of) Australia once in my life - and who knows, maybe have a mini/micro meet with some hootooer(s) there.
Well, back to figuring out which stories I can sell to what media....
<- (My kangaroo impersonation)
Apr 14, 2009
I'm still alive and kicking. (Ask Babette whom I kick )
Like spring rummages, ideas keep popping up in my head.
In six years I'll be able to retire and leave the kids, the union and all other obligations to mind themselves.
I've done my solidaric and democratic duty since I was 18.
Another couple of years of responsibility, and I can do as I please.
X-mas and New Year in Italy
Dec 21, 2008
I'm leaving for Italy in a few hours.
*Trails behind her*
Dec 9, 2008
I've been present in this society seven years and five days.
The best word in the book
Jun 12, 2008
In itself it is not a fancy or resounding word. Quite boring and with a dusty smell of bureaucracy, actually.
(Sorry, today I'm not bothering with checking English spelling and grammar, so, you just have to do your best to understand. )
But cooperation in practise is as sweet and sensual, as it comes.
Right now I am at a Nordic summit meet for freelance journalists.
In spite of a 6 hour long board meet on the ferry from Copenhagen to Oslo last night, including too much wine and too little sleep, a flight from Oslo to Trondheim (2/3 up in Norway), and formal meeting items - it is still very interesting and very usefull to confirm cooperation on a Nordic and European scale.
After the summit meet we break tomorrow at noon and change to a Nordic Freelance Seminar with speakers from USA, Russia and Norway. Freelance photographers, television dokumentarists, ghost writers, news journalists, bloggers etc. etc.
I asked the woman at the reception desk about the light at this time of year. She says it gets 'kind of dark between 02 and 04'. Otherwise it is 'day time light' for the rest of the 24 hours.
I've never experienced 'midnight sun' before, so I'm looking forward to that.
Unfortunately, for the next five days, the forecast is rain and 10-16 degrees C.
Apr 11, 2008
I'm going on a holiday.
Take care out there in the meantime
Dec 26, 2007
Both my daughters are on Facebook - as am I, although I don't know what I can actually do there.
The youngest, 21, has added photos she took because we needed photos for promoting the musical stuff we do together. I don't think we can use them for that - but otherwise they are quite good.
A nice elderly couple, married for many years, at the harbour in Randers, Denmark.
I'm not sure how Facebook works, or whether you are allowed to see the album - but here is a link, if you are curious.
A sharp corner
Oct 17, 2007
At exactly 00:00 a birthday e-card entered my e-mail.
Hati and Hapi
Some years ago I decided that 55 was a nice looking birthday to throw a party. But I forgot untill a couple of days ago. Now I have to wait till 77.
(And I'm not allowed to fiddle with this mysterious parcel from Estonia before this evening when Sig. S. returns from work (early morning shift) and daughter #2 arrives.
I have some deadlines to attend to, so help yourselves.
Have to to catch a
Sep 4, 2007
I'm sitting here i Århus, the second largest city in Denmark. Having the use of a colleague's flat with an internet connection. W*rking desperately to accomodate a paper's deadline.
My colleague is in Copenhagen, and luckily his daughter, the guardian of the second set of keys, lives not too far away from the main station.
Not that I really care about the articles. The content is important enough - in my eyes - but it doesn't matter whether it is written now or next week.
But because my articles are needed to fill up the paper, I sit here in an unknown appartment in the middle of the city listening to seagulls scream, kids talk and the cultural festival week go by.
For the information of the people who don't know, I'm an abuser of alcohol, an alcoholic if you like that better. In my mind there is a distinction - but I fear that in my family's mind the distinction is of no importance.
I'm in a foul mood. I like to think that I drink to become happier. And I do - for a while - and then, like all alcoholics, I cry. I guess each of us have a special item/subject to cry about.
All my journals have been written when I've been drinking, and when I thought I had something to give or ask for.
Most of the time I don't drink. I'm too old, I hurt my family, nothing good comes out of drinking - well except a smile sometimes.
I love life. I think it is a duty to be happy and contribute - without getting repaid - or whatever it is called.
Most males in my life - husband, son, late dad and some friends - are very eager to point out to me that life is a misery (my interpretation ) and 'a pessimist is a well-informed optimist'.
I refuse to agree. I love sunshine, bird's song, tall grass, imagerian language, good books, intriguing paintings, difficult music - and sentimentality. Since I've grown old I'm really a sucker for a good cry.
Don't tell the women in my 'liberation group', or the people in the socialistic societies.
I'm as firm and steadfast in my gender-related and political views as I've always been.
Hopefully I have not robbed anybody of their beliefs.
Thanks for listening.
Self made ?
May 28, 2007
For a long time I've been an employee although I haven't had an employer since midsummer 1993.
No employer means no certain income, no holidays to speak of, no set w*rking hours = no days off.
Our country's system means that I can actually supplement my freelancing jobs with dole for the 'not registered w*rking hours'.
My family insists I'm w*rking all the time - day and night - during weekends and whatever holidays employed w*rker regularily have.
And, yes. I seem to attend more to my pc than to anybody else. I even have rented an office in a nearby town.
The key word is 'seem'. Because allthough I sit in my 'home office' or stand in my 'town office', I always have time for husband, kids, grandchildren, colleagues and friends. The hours I've put in for driving to football matches, collecting bicycles at places from where my daugther has hitchhiked, picking up my husband from w*rk, talking to people who needed a sympathetic ear, working around everybody else's plans are innumerable.
I'm not complaining. I like being indispensable. .
I just want to have longer hours and a better condition, because I'm too old to meet the exspectations I promise to meet.
A motherless child
Dec 22, 2006
The first time I heard "Sometimes, I feel like a motherless child", I felt . Isn't it the ultimate sensation of being a grown human? Being all alone and nobody loves you unconditionally?
I interpret now that this is the basic human feeling: I'm all alone and - 'nobody knows the trouble I've seen' - etc. Some people's trouble are indeed very hard to endure. Not mine, I hasten to say.
But a motherless child, yes. More so, because my mother is rapidly going off her mind. Is getting demented. And I find myself both coping and getting exasperated when she calls me the umpteenth time to ask and talk about the same thing we did yesterday.
No problem, I can take care of my mother - and all my kids - and my husband, the oldest child in af Slovenian/Italian family, finds it quite natural to offer my mother a home in our house.
Actually, it is not done in Denmark in these times - but maybe we'll do it anyway. The house is big enough.
And here I was, hoping, that when all my kids have grown up, there would be some kind of me-time.
Two years ago my mother sent me a cartoon picturing a grandchild and a grandmother in a twin push chair - the child in one side, the grandma in another, and the middle aged woman pushing, thats me.
I've ensured that my youngest son (17) will take over when I collapse. He said 'yes' while sms'ing, watching Simson's, writing a biology report, listening to music, praticing scales on the guitar and corresponding on messenger.
And now -
Sep 9, 2006
I would very much like to be present every day in the conversations and discussions with my hootoo friends.
But I cannot keep up for the time being: Too much w*rk and family matters in real life - and in a week I'll hopefully go away for two weeks on a holiday.
I'll return and catch up with on-going conversations and dig out the ones I've left hanging.
Still got the blues for you
Aug 5, 2006
Today I listened to a cd burnt from an old tape of 'garage rock'.
I participated in some of the singing. Enough said.
(Not _too_ bad if you have a kind ear. )
I'm thinking about age.
Right now I still think I've got my best years to come.
My mother - only twenty years older than me (73) - is on the road to becoming totally demented.
My mother in law (84) is as bright as she has ever been - but has incessantly complained about her legs, her back and her husband for the 23 years I've known her.
Tonight I agreed to borrow a car and drive my son to a party because friends from far away were present.
I spent 2½ hours on the road and 60$ on petrol.
To cut a long story short: The owner of the car is a single mother - because her husband committed suicide by hanging himself. She is now in sole charge of an adult mentally handicapped and autistic child, an adult manio-depressive child on heavy medication and a teenage son of my youngest son's age - who steadies himself on non-oregano.
The woman, the mother, is studying for an education as a laboratory assistant. No need to spell out that money is sparse in that family. She provides for the whole family by student's allowances and loans - supported by the handicapped adult who of course has a pension - tax payed.
Can you tell. I'm all for taxes. The more, the better.
I don't need an extra bottle of red wine during the week.
My income and supplementary dole is quite enough to keep a roof over our heads and feed and clothe the family. And even pay for the internet connection
Materially I have everything a woman could need - and more, much more.
So what is this thing 'growth' they are talking about like holy s**t?
This is a right rant.
Well, not really .
Cry - just a little bit harder
Oct 8, 2005
I get cheered up no end from men, women and children doing the outstanding.
The humans, personalities who dare to enrich our lives. With a smile, a song, a political point of view etc. Commitment.
My (very young) kids revive the 60es and 70es for me. My youth that is. Freedom, love, solidarity - *the* meaning of life.
Only two days ago I watched the 'Woodstock Diary' with my family. It made me proud to remember the ideals of then. To feel and to know that I haven't let them down, and to sense that my kids have grasped the intentions and proceed to live and act for those ideals in *their* way.
Oh, they fail, as I have done. They get themselves a rougher deal. But I'm convinced that they - like my oldest - will do their best and will never be corrupted.
I'm proud of my kids. They try - and a little bit harder.
I've had some rough three weeks. So, I cry - and a little bit harder.
But as I am a naive, positive and enthusiatic person - I look for the best and see the good stuff.
I need a -
My moment of fame
Jul 29, 2005
During the summer our regional television has talked to five people about Hopes and Dreams. One of them my husband Sig. S.
During the 8-9 minutes story I, our youngest daugther, a couple of friends also are interviewed.
And there are loads of pictures from our home, garden, the wood nearby and Sig. S.'s workplace.
Everything is in Danish.
But if curiosity s, you can have a look at http://www.tv2regionerne.dk/reg2005/?r=7 - tick off 27. (july) on the calender shown and go to "Håb & Drømme" near the bottom of the list.
You'll need Quick Time Player or something like it.
I'll spare you the story for the moment.
Nothing compares to...smiles :-)
May 23, 2004
I collect smiles.
How beautiful smiles are.
The satisfactory smile of your grandson who passes you with a well kicked ball. Or the one, with which he is happy to repeat putting hat on your head, then trousers, then a blouse...shake your head ...and start all over...again and again. Sitting on top of all the clothes, you can possibly pile from all drawers nearby.
Or just collect innummerable pebbles and put them somewhere else.
The content and safe smiles of your children when they are in love or just have grasped your latest spin of words. When they tell you about their wisdom of life.
Or the smile of the pensioner who is watching the puppies of his dog. Maybe he is a ing husband. I don't know. But when he watches and care for his puppies, I melt.
Also there is the 88 year old guy who abandoned his car and bought a scooter. He said that he wanted to sow grass all over his garden. But when spring comes and the seeds are for sale...then a beautiful smile. A 110 leeks he has, he told me this afternoon. .
I like people and their different lives.
They all have the right and the reason to be who they are.
As the 92 year old woman who New Years Day gave me an encouraging smile: "I'm always alone. Nobody wants to visit me." And then this smile. Not pityfull, not enduring. Just accepting. With a smile. But why should she?
How to answer? I couldn't.
And then she went upstairs to her two rooms. Solitaire.
But of course. The smiles I remember best are the ones that put a light into peoples lives.
I have a friend. He is usually nondescript and well controlled. But when he smiles it is like and melting gold.
I collect smiles. They're the best in life.
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